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Question
Posted by: Connie | 2008/11/20

Husband hook on Porn

My husband of 15 years is hook on porn. Does he love me? I found all these porn website on his Favourite column on his laptop..what do I make of it? Is he bored? I need help before I loose it, yes we have kids.!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Do search the archives of this forum, as I've discussed this topic so often. It doesn't say anything unpleasant about you, that he has this interest, anymore than it['d insult your cooking if he collected recipe books.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Um | 2008/11/24

My husband has healthy hobbies, he goes mountain biking when he' s frustrated. He doesn' t hide a disgusting habit/addiction and then satisfies himself when he can spend time with me, his wife and make love to me.

Reply to Um
Posted by: JP | 2008/11/24

Thanks Connie. I guess i' m lucky for my wife feels the same as I do. Although she suspects me for " peeping"  every now and then... She says ALL MEN DOES IT...

Reply to JP
Posted by: Connie | 2008/11/21

Ok Guys thanks for all the input...but what do I do now? I think he found out because on his laptop all history of pornsites have been destroyed! I don' t want to face him JP I wish u were my guy (like ur views) also y Anon u seem to agree a bit more as for bedroom antics..I think I' m up there with the rest of them if not betta don' t want 2 BLOW my own horn or anything. I' m decent and starting to hate my husband...

Reply to Connie
Posted by: felicity | 2008/11/21

*sigh* porn is only OK if both parties agree to it. If a women finds it distasteful or disgusting then the husband must stop if he respects her. Respect is a key word here. If he respected her he would not bring filth into the home. I am not a prude but I disagree with women having to be demeaned for all and sundry to salivate over. If " his"  daughter got into porn would his view change or would he be OK with " normal men"  salivating over her

Reply to felicity
Posted by: JP | 2008/11/21

Sigh - Point taken. But if and when she walks past, I don' t think what I want to do with her between the sheets. I' ll see her, and would most certainly tell my wife, that the woman that just passed us had a sexy... But I would not get (you know what) and then take it out on my wife. One can mos control what you think, were you look ect.

i suppose this can go on forever, but in my mind, porn = strip club (in your mind) Same woman in any case....

Reply to JP
Posted by: *sigh* | 2008/11/21

Look, i agree, if it takes the place of the woman, then it' s wrong and i guess you might be seeing it as cheating, fair enough, i would agree with you there, didn' t know till after i posted the comment that it was that bad.

BUT, i still honestly think that when a guy browses just once in a while, have one or two mags lying around under he' s shirts in the cupboard, that it is honestly not worth getting all worked up about, in fact, i think it' s quite healthy.

JP, you can' t disagree with me that guys are visual beings, and like to look at nice things. Don' t tell me that when a super-model-like woman walk past you on the beach in a bikini that your mind does not wander? Be honest now?

As for strip clubs, i hate those places, they' re filthy. At least when you look at porn he does it in his own home by himself?

Again, i' m saying that if it happens now and then, it' s nothing but a sign that you' ve got yourself a healthy, red-blooded male, and it might just zoost things up a bit, BUT if it replaces you (Connie), then i agree with JP, but only then...

Reply to *sigh*
Posted by: JP | 2008/11/21

Its a " 3rd"  person, becauce it leads to feelings like Connie currently has! He get turned on by these woman. I bed you he " does something"  to deflate... Thus he think about these woman and want to be with them! That in my book is cheat...

Sigh, what you saying is, he can look at porn, to to strip clubs etc etc, as long as he never meet the woman, (and don' t look at their faces).

No, that is not good enough for me. I' m not insecure, but if she thinks of other men in " that"  way, I better not know about it, for i' ll file for divorce!!

Secondly, you are happy to see him get all exited by other woman and then takes it out on you?

Reply to JP
Posted by: *sigh* | 2008/11/21

Oh come on JP, what' s wrong with it??

How could a piece of paper be a third person?? The guy' s never gonna meet this woman ever in his life, he doesn' t know her name, her phone nr., where she lives, he won' t even recognize her on the street cause, let' s be honest, it' s not her face he' s looking at!

Connie, my apologies...you' re right, it is a problem when he chooses that over you, definitely. You say you' re a very sexual person, but, if you don' t mind me asking, do you keep things interesting, take initiative, take the lead? Or is it always the same thing? Regardless if it' s constant or not

Reply to *sigh*
Posted by: anon2 | 2008/11/21

JP, I agree, it is wrong wish all men were like you!!!

Reply to anon2
Posted by: JP | 2008/11/21

I beg to differ!!! PORN IS WRONG! Its like bringing a 3rd person into the bedroom, hidden behind the mask -" But all men do it" !!

Well, i' m a man... NOT GAY, and I say Porn is wrong, its like adultary, cheating!!

Reply to JP
Posted by: CONNIE | 2008/11/21

ANON, thanx for your reply I do know guys like porn..why not share it with your wife? It become' s a problem when he stay up late at nite watching this s$4ht and leave his wife high and dry..bear in mind I' m a very sexual person! Who then when he had enough of " viewing"  cum to bed to have sex with me.I want to be the one to turn him on not sum slut on Porn!!

Reply to CONNIE
Posted by: ANON | 2008/11/21

oops, in the 2nd paragraph i meant to say " NOOO it doesn' t mean that he wished you looked like the woman in those pictures" .... sorry

Reply to ANON
Posted by: *sigh* | 2008/11/21

OH GET OVER your conservative self! There is nothing wrong with a man watching porn! It' s just something a guy does!!

NOOOO it doesn' t mean that he doesn' t love you, NOOOO it doesn' t mean that he doesn' t find you attractivr, NOOOO it doesn' t mean you looked like the woman in those pictures!

YESSSS it means he' s normal, YESSSS it means he' s a man with normal urges, YESSS he' s allowed to look at it, YESSSS that' s just how guys are put together.

You like looking at recipies/latest fashion/etc, it excites you and you can oodle over it for hours, and he likes looking at porn, it excites him and he can oodle over it for hours.

Reply to *sigh*

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