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Question
Posted by: Lizette | 2011-05-30

Husband doesn''t want sex

My husband and I are both 34 years old and have a 11 month old baby boy. Since the birth of our son, I can count on my two hands how many times we''ve had sex - and usually I have to bring it up before it will happen. I''m back to my old weight, must admit my body doesn''t look the same as before the baby, but I am still in good shape and take care of myself. How do I make this better for both of us, I am not the type to appear in sexy lingerie out of the blue, and I think he will just laugh at me anyway. I am just SO scared our marriage is slowly but surely going down the drain - it feels as if I share a house with a roommate :(

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

The birth of a child usually has a huge impact on a relationship, responsibilities and the relationship dynamic. It sometimes can even have an impact on how we view our partners – before he/she was a definite sex symbol and all of a sudden they got another role – “mother/father”. I am of the opinion that most couples can benefit from couple counseling after the birth of a child – to assist them to grow into the next phase and allowing it to have a positive rather than a negative impact on the relationship. By the sound of it you can most definitely benefit from a consult with a professional psychologist working in the field of sexual health. You are welcome to phone our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted in finding a practitioner as close as possible to you.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

5
Our users say:
Posted by: sal | 2011-06-02

come on, go to your neighbours.

Reply to sal
Posted by: Andre | 2011-05-31

I am a man and i have got the same problem with my partner. She does not want sex and i have to beg her for sex.she always got stories and exuses. In the begining of our relationship it was good and as the years go along it just fade away. Every time i touch hir she takes my hand away and turn around. So what do you think must i do. If i whant to talk to her about it, she just reply not now.

Reply to Andre
Posted by: jack | 2011-05-31

Have you talk to him and ask him what it is that he does not want to have sex any more, to talk about it is better than silance.Tell him before you start that you dont want to fight,but you just want to know.Is the baby sleeping in his own room and own bed, because a big turnoff is when the baby is still sleeping in your room or bed.

Reply to jack
Posted by: sexologist | 2011-05-31

The birth of a child usually has a huge impact on a relationship, responsibilities and the relationship dynamic. It sometimes can even have an impact on how we view our partners – before he/she was a definite sex symbol and all of a sudden they got another role – “mother/father”. I am of the opinion that most couples can benefit from couple counseling after the birth of a child – to assist them to grow into the next phase and allowing it to have a positive rather than a negative impact on the relationship. By the sound of it you can most definitely benefit from a consult with a professional psychologist working in the field of sexual health. You are welcome to phone our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted in finding a practitioner as close as possible to you.

Reply to sexologist
Posted by: Jim | 2011-05-30

In other words - You feel the same way the majority of most married men feel

Reply to Jim

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