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Question
Posted by: Sannie | 2011-11-02

Husband and the prostitute

Hi
I found out and my husband confesses, he had sex with a black prostitute. (Colour is not the issue, a prostitute are a prostitute)
I am devastated.
His reason for doing that this was a fantasy to have sex with a black woman.
I went for SHIV and STD test. And have to go for the next 6 years.
There were never problems with our sex life. I never had a headache, or anything, I gave him what he wants, oral sex the lot to keep him happy.
Apparently he claims that the majority of white men had sex with a black woman. Is that true?
Trust is broking and will never be restored.
I even have to let my domestic maid leave because his fantasy temptation.
How does anyone continue to have a normal marriage after this?
And the bastard claims to be racist .

Why ????

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Of course you're devastated. And wise to have full STD / HIV testing - how inconsiderate that to indulge one of his fantasies he was content to risk your life and well-being, as well as happiness. I doubt that the majority of white men have sex with a black woman, but it isn't relevant at all - if the majority of women beat their husbands, would he meekly accept that you should beat him too ? However many people do a foolish or dangerous thing, that doesn't make it a good thing to do.
That he claims to be racist isn't surprising - I suspect there are really grubby parts of his fantasies, and back in the bad days of Old Apartheid when any form of sex across the colour bar was illegal, its remarkable how many right-wing politicians and dominees were prominent among those who got arrested.
If you feel the mariage could be worth preserving, surely proper marriage counselling is called for. Otherwise a consultation with a good divorce lawyer.

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5
Our users say:
Posted by: sannie | 2011-11-04

my e-mail liz2020@webmail.co.za

Reply to sannie
Posted by: Hmmm | 2011-11-03

Pack his things and put them outside. Then he can sleep with as many prostitues as he likes and you won''t have to be degraded again. You deserve better.

I wish you the best and understand that you must be devastated.

Reply to Hmmm
Posted by: Anon | 2011-11-03

Which just goes to show, people dont cheat because they are not getting sex or not what they want in bed - they cheat because it was in their hearts all along.

Sannie, I feel really bad for you.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: To Petra | 2011-11-03

I cannot find your address you sent me....

Reply to To Petra
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-11-03

Of course you're devastated. And wise to have full STD / HIV testing - how inconsiderate that to indulge one of his fantasies he was content to risk your life and well-being, as well as happiness. I doubt that the majority of white men have sex with a black woman, but it isn't relevant at all - if the majority of women beat their husbands, would he meekly accept that you should beat him too ? However many people do a foolish or dangerous thing, that doesn't make it a good thing to do.
That he claims to be racist isn't surprising - I suspect there are really grubby parts of his fantasies, and back in the bad days of Old Apartheid when any form of sex across the colour bar was illegal, its remarkable how many right-wing politicians and dominees were prominent among those who got arrested.
If you feel the mariage could be worth preserving, surely proper marriage counselling is called for. Otherwise a consultation with a good divorce lawyer.

Reply to cybershrink

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