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Question
Posted by: VERY CONFUSED | 2011/11/28

HUSBAND

I don''t know whats up with my husband. We have not had sex for four months! If I try to get sexy with him he told me that he have no desire and that he must see a doctor because he think he got a problem but he never make the effort to go and see a doctor? He is 41 years old. Yesterday at the clothing store I tried on a swim suit and I heard him told the lady that he get so liss when he see me naked - I was so cross with him over this as I felt he embarassed me infornt of a stranger. We are married 17 years now and I am the same age as he.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe he's just making an excuse by saying he must see a doctor, but take him up on that suggestion and strongly encourage it. Even men innocent of any cheating may lose sexual desire for a number of reasons, perhaps as a reaction to medications or physical illnesses, or depression - its wise to have these possibilities checked. People in general, and men in particular, feel shy and coy about admitting and discussing such problems with even a doc, so encourage him to do so ( it can only benefit you, too ) and offer to make the appointment for him if he feels shy about ringing up. Offer to go with him, if he feels such support would help.
Telling a sales lady how he feels about seeing you naked is just really really bad manners, whatever else it might represent. Have you changed physically ? Got much more over-weight or otherwise less desirable than you used to be ? ( or has he ? )

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Raynoch | 2011/12/03

Thanks guys, I just about lost it lokinog for this.

Reply to Raynoch
Posted by: jeremiah boonzaaier | 2011/12/02

@ VERY CONFUSED it was just a honest question. when i married my wife she was 22 but most people thought she was 18. as she has let herself go over the years she is now 30 but most people think she is in her late 40s. i am unsure what to do as bringing up the weight issue always leads to a fight and further binge eating! so you can see where im coming from!

Reply to jeremiah boonzaaier
Posted by: VERY CONFUSED | 2011/12/01

@Jeremiah why do guys always think a women''s looks is the problem - I am 41 but most of the people who don''t know me thinks I am in my early 30. I really take good care of myself and is not old for my age, I like to adventureous stuff like hiking, running etc. But thank you your just proof that men always want to blame a women - it is alwasy her looks or blah blah. Thank you G Wilson for your constructive advise - will definetly follow it!

Reply to VERY CONFUSED
Posted by: G. Wilson | 2011/12/01

He may have low testosterone levels and need a shot - perhaps one for his bad manners as well!If you are still looking good it''s time to start flirting and getting some other male interest.this will flush out his position if he has other interests!!! become your own person - be interesting and mysterious -make him wake up!!

Reply to G. Wilson
Posted by: jeremiah Boonzaaier | 2011/11/30

are you still physically attractive or have you let yourself go in recent years

Reply to jeremiah Boonzaaier
Posted by: Merl | 2011/11/30

He is either getting it elsewhere with a much younger good looking youngster or he has some sickness that he still needs to accept before he can share it with you. I recommend that you suggest that you see a marriage counsellor to look into your problem. Good luck

Reply to Merl
Posted by: Annie | 2011/11/30

He is cheating on you.

Reply to Annie
Posted by: Charlie | 2011/11/28

He needs a good klap! How rude......you have all the right to be embarrassed. Let him go see the doc, however I don''t think he really wants to. Good luck and don''t put up with that type of behaviour from him any longer!

Reply to Charlie
Posted by: XXX | 2011/11/28

He clearly does have a problem,so I suggest you talk to him and get him to a dr

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Tom | 2011/11/28

He is getting it elsewhere dear.

Reply to Tom
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/11/28

Maybe he's just making an excuse by saying he must see a doctor, but take him up on that suggestion and strongly encourage it. Even men innocent of any cheating may lose sexual desire for a number of reasons, perhaps as a reaction to medications or physical illnesses, or depression - its wise to have these possibilities checked. People in general, and men in particular, feel shy and coy about admitting and discussing such problems with even a doc, so encourage him to do so ( it can only benefit you, too ) and offer to make the appointment for him if he feels shy about ringing up. Offer to go with him, if he feels such support would help.
Telling a sales lady how he feels about seeing you naked is just really really bad manners, whatever else it might represent. Have you changed physically ? Got much more over-weight or otherwise less desirable than you used to be ? ( or has he ? )

Reply to cybershrink

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