Our expert says:
If he's working fulltime and studying part-time, its surely very likely he has no time for ANYONE< including you. Marriage is a big step, but it doesn't automatically create more time than there is. Your snooping in his phone ( alweays creates the problem that revealing what you discovered also reveals you were snooping ) discovered what sounds like a previous relationship, which apparently he stopped when he married you. And for God's Sake, people STOP THINKING YOU HAVE TO "CONFRONT"EACH OTHER - any counsellor or psychobabbler who recommends "confrontation" as a useful response to most situations should be tied up and confronted for several years.
It sounds as though it would be hard for you to ignore what you have discovered, so you will need to TALK about it, NON-confrotnationally ( confrontation immediately drops the chances of learnin anything useful or of healing the relationship ).
YOu don't mention the dates of the messages you found - does it appear as though these were responses from someone he had told NOT to continue a relationship ( whether an affair or not ) - and does it appear these may be about him ending it at the time of the marriage or after it ?
As Mr Practical suggests, was there other evidence DURING the marriage or close to it, of him being away, and spending time with someone else ? Maybe this was someone in his class at studies, who he was seeing at the same time ; maybe it was a real affair on his part, or merely something she wanted and he resisted.
Simply choose a good time, when nothing much else is going on and you will have undisturbed time together, and talk about whatever reason you had to be trawling in his phone, maybe that you were feeling neglected and worried, and the messages you found, and that you don't want to jump to conclusions, but that you really need him to explain to you what they represent, and what had been going on. He may or may not tell you some or the whole truth, but "confrontation" will get you less, not more.
I don't agree with Mr Practical about a Lie Detector test, as they are far from infallible ( that's why their results are NOT allowed in court ) - they shopw arousal, and someone very upset about being falsely accused, or about an upsetting situation which bothers him but isn't quite what you think, may test positive.
You could explore the other numbers you found, and at least check who they belong to.
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