Posted by: zowi | 2009-10-12

How to deal with this

Hi there !
I'  ve been with my BF for four years now and we have a five months baby boy but we are not staying together.The thing he'  s been calling me to come over at his place for the past 2days but he calls when its late for me to take the baby and go to his place.
Sunday morning I was going to church so I organise a lift with a guy from church since it was raining who is also my cousin'  s BF so we saw him and we try to stop but the place was not right for us to just stop so I decided to give him a call he was not happy at all when he picked up the phone and then he asked where I was and I told him that I am in the car that just passed him and I'  m on my way to church as I told him that I was going to go to church then come back to his place. He was just quiet,not saying anything so I put the phone down.When I reached church I called him but he was not picking,after church he was not picking as well and he dicided to put his phone off.
I dicided to go over to his place but i left the baby behind because I donr want my baby to here us shouting at each other when I went there he did'  nt even want to open the door for me I had to call him loud and when he opened he was not interested on saying just one word with me he just covered his face with blankets.I just spent few minutes and dicided to leave.He didnt call Or say anything till now.I sent him an sms and he said now he is convinced that it was my BF.
He has never been like this before and I have never cheated on him before even though he did and I forgave him because I love him.
Is there anything I can do to fix this.Please advise me .

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sorry, folks, but as I have to rush to Durban for an emergency, this forum was supposed to have been closed from Noon Monday, and has only been left open by mistake. So it will be extremely difficult for me to respond to all questions before Friday.
He shouldn't be selfish about expecting you to visit him at times when you cas't brin the baby or leave her at home. You're a friend or partner, not a literal call-girl. If he doesn't want to work with you and a couples counsellor to sort things out, why would you want to stay with him ? I dont see what you would apologise for, it's him who has been behaving badly.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Wise3 Owl | 2009-10-13

He sounds like a real jerk ! Your first big mistake was forgiving him for cheating on you, I am surprised you have any feelings for him. He clearly does not respect you and you deserve respect. I would seriously consider my options in this relationship as its not heading anywhere positive. I would work on ending this relationship or you and your baby will pay the price for the rest of your lives., Even though you are not married, he has an obligation by law to provide maintenance for your baby. Nail him to the wall !!

Reply to Wise3 Owl
Posted by: almost mad | 2009-10-12

Your story is very confusing. But ' women'  is right, y are you trying to say sorry? Any man that truly loves you and your baby will not ignre you like this for something so petty. he obviously doesnt know what real love is. He is pathetic and childish, He probably has someone else.

Reply to almost mad
Posted by: Kelly | 2009-10-12

You have a baby with him, that should change everything!
How can he accuse you of cheating on him.
Maybe he is looking for a way out, and that would be blaming you for something...
He can' t expect you to come running after him in the rain and all with a little baby!

Reply to Kelly
Posted by: Woman | 2009-10-12

Things we women put up with..he' s the one who is not taking ur calls and giving u the attitude but u feel the need to apologise, for what if i may ask?

Reply to Woman

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