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Question
Posted by: Latoya | 2010-05-06

How easy is it to get out of a relationship

Last year i posted a concern which i got the answer, although it was harsh, it was true, i agreed with everyone, but i couldnt get out.
I need to end a relationship that is over a year, the guy is staying with a woman and their child, i told him several times that we need to end the relationship since i know it is not right, but he keeps calling me, he come to my place, but it is difficult for me to put my foot down and say, enough is enough.
we eat, do a lot of things together, sleep, and then he go home, i dont have anyone in my life, he does not add any value in my life, but it is difficult to stop seeing him. My mind and my heart are saying 2 different things, in my mind i know it has to stop, because the relationship does not look like it will ever go anywehre, but my heart says no.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

How long is a piece of string ? It always varies, and depends on the nature of the relationship and the personalities of the people involved.
Sometimes truth is harsh, but none the less important to face.
Now in the present situation you describe you are not behaving like someone who actually wants to end the relationship - but you say you do because you know you should. YOu don't need to answer when he calls you, after telling him the relationship is over and that you will no longer take his calls. You don't need to feed him, or to let him i the door if he comes round.
his relationship is not going to go anywhere ; he is cheaing on his wife and child and will surely cheat on you, and may be already cheating on you. Don't you deserve somehing far better than this ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Love | 2010-05-06

Like CS says, u tell him its over then NEVER take his calls again..If he comes dont open the door..It will be hard at first but as time goes u will be fine and feel good about urself..

He is just using u and should the day comes that he decides to leave u believe me he wont hesitate.

Reply to Love
Posted by: Tamara | 2010-05-06

Get out of it, I just got out of exactly the same situation - very difficuly and sad, but you have to. He will never leave them, he is using you, you know this is true - alone is betetr than feeling like that, trust me. get out, now!!!! break free, take back the power into your hands and live a happy and healthy life.

Reply to Tamara
Posted by: Happiness | 2010-05-06

Maybe you''re in a comfort zone and the fear of change and the unknown is too much to bear. Since just telling you to leave him does not work. You can start by spending less time with him while making new friends or new intrests. Re dsicover your self, read books, join classes, travel and do anything which you have to depend on yourself in order to do.

Reply to Happiness
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-05-06

How long is a piece of string ? It always varies, and depends on the nature of the relationship and the personalities of the people involved.
Sometimes truth is harsh, but none the less important to face.
Now in the present situation you describe you are not behaving like someone who actually wants to end the relationship - but you say you do because you know you should. YOu don't need to answer when he calls you, after telling him the relationship is over and that you will no longer take his calls. You don't need to feed him, or to let him i the door if he comes round.
his relationship is not going to go anywhere ; he is cheaing on his wife and child and will surely cheat on you, and may be already cheating on you. Don't you deserve somehing far better than this ?

Reply to cybershrink

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