Our expert says:
Hi BT, Sorry to hear about these sadnesses. Of course it was sad to have the dog put down, even though it was for the best of reasons, and saved him from further suffering. Those are reasons not to blame oneself, but not sufficient reasons not to feel sad.
Sounds like some of these are situations, like the birthday party, when for the sake of others, you understandably choose to suppress your emotions - which can become more of a habit, and gets applied even when you're on your own and free to express the emotions.
Comments like your boy's, promising to be a good boy, are heart-rending indeed. Its easy to forget that kids live in a world with themselves at the center ( like many adults, I suppose ) but with a sense of responsibility and agency many adults avoid - so they worry that whatever happens to parents and loved ones are because of THEM. and their being Bad ; so its well worthwhile to remember to re-assure them that they are loved, and not responsible for the things that happen in the adlt world - and indeed that their being good and loving is what greatly helps you to get through these other problems.
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