Posted by: ME | 2013-02-14

How do you handle this???

Hallo everyone,

I am not a regular here but would really appriciate your advices, and my apologies in advance I think this post is going to be longer...

Yeterday I had such bad evening. Firstly my helper decided not to go to school to pick up my 5 yr old gal. I have 2 kids, the other one (4rys) was staying with her at home because he had a flu, which was not serious at all. So i received a call from my daughters teacher asking is anyone coming to pick her up from school. To my shock, I called the helper, asking what happened and she told me that she had assumed that I was going to pick my daughter after work as she was staying with the other one at home. My house is 5 minutes walk to my kids school and its her responsibilty to fetch them every afternoon after school. I didnt know I have to tell her to walk with the other kid to school and collect another one, hello, i thought that was obvious as I didnt gave her any instructions not to collect the other kid.........anyway, I ended up paying for the aftercare.

Now here is the worst part, when I arrived at school, here I was busy apologising to to my daugther''s teacher and feeling so bad cos the woman just had a baby, she was busy holding her lil one when I arrived and her husband standing next to her. I really felt so baaaaaaaaad, like a really failure. She was so understanding, what a gud woman....She also told e that my daughter did not behave well at school that day, she took her clothes infront of other kids in the class, there were also boys in the lass around her age, and she also ate snacks from the floor and they found such behaviour not accepteble. At home if I may say my daughter is doing fine and following all rules and knows the consequences if she does something wrong and all that, we dont spoil our kids, we dont abuse them, they are such mormal kids, but lately I have receiving these msges bout my daughter and onther thing she does not follow instructions in the class at times.
I am still busy listening to all this from my daughter''s teacher, there comes the lady who is the principal of the school, didnt here here greeting, I had her saying something bout aftercare fee that we are supposed to pay, also heard her asking the teacher if she had told us about my daughter''s incident, which the teacher answered she was busy telling me that.

I was totally not paying attention to her, was bust listening to the teacher telling me all these things. My husbnd was there, the principal ended up talking to her.

We went home, just after 10 minutes or so, was busy trying to talk to my daughter trying to figure out what happened and all that. There I received a call from the Principal, shouting at me and asking me why am I giving her attitude, she greeted me earlier on and I didnt greet her back, instead i just looked her from head to toe.............hello, when exactly did I do that? was busy talking to my daughter''s teacher remeber?...frastrated and all........
I tried to listen to her and tried to defend nyself but she couldnt listen, she shouted at me telling me that I am being selfish and all that.

There was once this time, I think it was in 2011. I had problems with my husband and that time I was convinced that I am dervocing him, I went to the principal to see if I can be able to take my kids to onther school as i was leaving my husband. We ended up talking as she asked me what was wrong. I vented on her at some sort, and she convinced me and told me I was doing the right thing for leaving my husband and all......anyway, I ended up not leaving my husband......
Last year, the very same principal, she got in a process of devorce with her husband. She sent an email to every parent appealing that we should write letters of reference for her as her husband was accusing her of doing drugs and drinking alchohol, so now hubby wanted to take away everything from her including the school she had worked so hard for.......hubby was claiming that she was not fit to take care of our kids...
Anyway, my husband felt that we should not write this letter as her marriage was none of our business. We dont know her as a person, we felt that it was really none our business so we decided to ignore the letter issue.

So since then, I have noticed a change of attitude towards us, she would greet us at times when we greet her. This was realy not an issue to us, we ignored her, until yeterday.............shooo, she almost bite my head off. I was very shocked and angry at the same time, but I decided to let it go, saw her this morning at school while I was still busy talking to my tacher''s daughter again trying to apologise once more about what happened yeterday.....she didnt say a word, just pass by, even that didnt bother me at all.

I really dont understand her problem, I am not her friend at all. We are not even close. Why would she react like this?? Is it because of the letter we didnt write for her???
My main worry now is my kids, what if they treat them differently because they dont like us??? cause now it looks like that. I have never had problems with this woman at all.......She is just the principal for my kids....what is really the meaning of this????? Guys plx forgive me for such a long email, I know its crazy but your opinions would mean a lot right now. I was also thinking of taking my kids out of her school but will have to serve a notice of 1 month......... please forgive me once more for any wrong spellings if any... tx

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Our users say:
Posted by: Namthi | 2013-02-14

I dont think it will be necessary to change school, all you need to do is to approach the whole thing with professionalism not feelings, remember the greeting part its a two way street so what i mean is if she doesnt greet you, greet her do what is right and it will pay off. like Petty said mantain a good relationship with the class teacher all will be fine and yu dont have to be enemies with the principal if she is bitter towards you then wena be sweet towards her

Reply to Namthi
Posted by: Petty | 2013-02-14

If you have a relationship with the teacher i think you should worry less about the principal unless he has some direct contact with the kids every now and then.

Right now i would advise that you focus on your child''s behavior. It is however necessary that when you get the time you must go to the principal and try to iron things out, not becasuse you feel you have wronged her but because you are the bigger person and you do not like being involved in squabbles.

Good luck!

Reply to Petty

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