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Posted by: Boring Sex Life (BSL) | 2011/01/19

How do I spice up our...

Ok that''s a bit harsh maybe. We''re two late 20''s guys, doing it about once a day with me as the top. The sex is pleasant, but seems to always kind of be the same thing. We do use condoms but are thinking of stopping with them after our 1 year anniversary later this month.

So what are some ways you guys can suggest to make sex more interesting? Also, are there any cheap/household products or items that can make sex more interesting in a safe way? E.g. I discovered that Bonjela mouth gel tingles and " warms up"  the anus, but is it safe to use there? Are there any other interesting/kinky things that can be used/done? The two of us are open to just about anything...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Hi to you BSL and thanks for posting. First off, ensure you both get screened for HIV before you toss the condoms. In terms of spicing things up it sounds as if you both have healthy sex drives and simply need to become a bit more creative. Explore different positions, different lubes, role play, toys, using porn, edging, incorporating food into your play, switching roles for activities such as rimming and prostate play, nipple play, mild spanking or bondage, NOT having sex for a day or two simply to break the routine, playing outdoors or in your car, positioning mirrors so that you can both watch the action, trying out textured condoms, putting your lube in the fridge or warming it slightly, trying out a cock ring, talking 'dirty', having sex in a shower, giving each other instructions on what to do, wearing a blindfold, trying out telephone sex, have a conversation about fisting, explore various sensations on your balls, play with massage, write a script for your partner to play out, have sex in s l o w motion or limit the play to 5 minutes and force yourselves to stop what you're doing when the time expires, try using a female condom (for example a Femidom, designed for vaginal sex but ideal for anal sex), taking photos or making a video of each other jerking off, explore a fetish like sports gear or leather, have sex clothed, buy your partner a jockstrap, explore drag, explore tickling, be noisy or quiet, be rough or gentle, be fast or slow, be dominant or submissive, make your partner (the bottom) do all the work, play with ice..... just use your imagination! A word of caution on introducing house-hold products into the rectum: I don't know this mouth gel, but the rectal lining is very thin and fragile and is easily damaged or irritated. Also, if the product contains any alcohol be aware that this will be absorbed into the bloodstream.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: gay, lesbian and bisexual expert | 2011/01/20

Hi to you BSL and thanks for posting. First off, ensure you both get screened for HIV before you toss the condoms. In terms of spicing things up it sounds as if you both have healthy sex drives and simply need to become a bit more creative. Explore different positions, different lubes, role play, toys, using porn, edging, incorporating food into your play, switching roles for activities such as rimming and prostate play, nipple play, mild spanking or bondage, NOT having sex for a day or two simply to break the routine, playing outdoors or in your car, positioning mirrors so that you can both watch the action, trying out textured condoms, putting your lube in the fridge or warming it slightly, trying out a cock ring, talking 'dirty', having sex in a shower, giving each other instructions on what to do, wearing a blindfold, trying out telephone sex, have a conversation about fisting, explore various sensations on your balls, play with massage, write a script for your partner to play out, have sex in s l o w motion or limit the play to 5 minutes and force yourselves to stop what you're doing when the time expires, try using a female condom (for example a Femidom, designed for vaginal sex but ideal for anal sex), taking photos or making a video of each other jerking off, explore a fetish like sports gear or leather, have sex clothed, buy your partner a jockstrap, explore drag, explore tickling, be noisy or quiet, be rough or gentle, be fast or slow, be dominant or submissive, make your partner (the bottom) do all the work, play with ice..... just use your imagination! A word of caution on introducing house-hold products into the rectum: I don't know this mouth gel, but the rectal lining is very thin and fragile and is easily damaged or irritated. Also, if the product contains any alcohol be aware that this will be absorbed into the bloodstream.

Reply to gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
Posted by: Sam | 2011/01/19

I find roleplay quite fun... you each can take turns dtermining what scene to play out - or make it a surprise (clothing, underwear, blindfold, restraints etc). Also being verbal. Massage (with toys?). Trying different positions or new locations (couch, shower, kitchen, floor, balcony...)

Reply to Sam
Posted by: Gareth | 2011/01/19

There are MANY ways, but not everything will work for everyone. You guys need to start talking to each other and especially listening to each other. Why not start with talking about fantasies and what turns each of you on, and then exploring a few of those options?

Reply to Gareth

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