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Question
Posted by: mimi | 2010-05-31

How do I overcome this ?

Hi doc , I am 32 years old married and 2 kids. I dont know why I act in the way I do but it is something that I have realised of myself and I whish that I was not like this, I have lost many friendships in my life.
I like to think that I am approachable and I am always friendly , I laugh easily but this is actualy a mask , people like to be with me but I dont always feel the same , I will go for cofee with a friend and then will not have contact with that person for weeks , and then if I walk into them I always make up excuses , when I was in school I use to have a best friend but after school I just lost contact and did nothing to regain this friend , its like I crawl into a shell and stay there, my hb has to sometimes drag me to visit friends , I never want to go but end up going and having the most fun. For example , I am a very positive , happi chappi at work , and I was invited to go scrap booking with one of the ladies , the first thing that went through my head was what excuse can I use not to go ..... I dont want to be like this , I was molested when I was 8 years old , I went for therapy and I thought I was ok but I wonder if this insecurity of me comes from this ? I was always classified as an introvert , but I cant run away from people for the rest of my life ? please help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe the work of your earlier therapy isn't complete. Anyhow, more practical, CBT-style therapy could help you sort out how you might beneficially improve your habitual thoughts and behaviours in the mos fruitful way.
And if someone invotes you to go scrap-booking ( I can understand your reluctance !) - justy say NO - politely and pleasantly, but you don'tnhave to accept every suggestion made to you

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Happiness | 2010-06-01

Hi Mimi,

I''m also an introvert, I like my space and I''m not sure I want it otherwise. Its easier and more comfortable for me to spend weekends in my house then going out to socialise with friends. I have the cheapest phone bill because I don''t call friends on a regular basis.
What works for me though is I''m a collector. I''m still in contact with all my high school friends and tertiary ones. I''ll email all of them at once asking how is life and we''ll end up chatting, or just sms them. That way I''m not expected to pitch up at their convenience.

Reply to Happiness
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-05-31

Maybe the work of your earlier therapy isn't complete. Anyhow, more practical, CBT-style therapy could help you sort out how you might beneficially improve your habitual thoughts and behaviours in the mos fruitful way.
And if someone invotes you to go scrap-booking ( I can understand your reluctance !) - justy say NO - politely and pleasantly, but you don'tnhave to accept every suggestion made to you

Reply to cybershrink

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