Our expert says:
It's obviously nice, and preferable, that your mom approves and likes your bf, but surely not essential ? You may have indeitifed a major reason for her dislike --- she wants you and your children entirely to herself, and not to share them. And this is the second time she has done this ? You need a calm talk with her, making it clear that your marriage will not lose her contact with you or the children unless she insists on doing it that way. That the wedign will go ahead with or without her, though you'd much prefer her to be a happy and active participant. And tell her exactly what you said in your last paragraph. Mke it clear she will no longer be allowed a power of veto, but has the invitation to be a loved member of your family. It is NOT disrespectful to assert your own rights as an adult --- it IS disrespectful for her to have refused to take not that you are an adult with the right to your own happiness.
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