Our expert says:
Sounds like a lazy, irresponsible and selfish guy and a lousy husband. Is it worthwhile to raise with the family that intervened that he dropped out of the counselling and went back to his bad old habits ? His threats sound illegal and potentially dangrous. GEt advice from groups like POWA that help abused women find safer ways to leave such a brute.
Fortunately, all marriage are absolutely not like this, and there's no excuse for his selfishness and cruelty.
And consult a good lawyer ; whatever the law says about community of property, in a divorce on grounds of his cruelty, neglect and threats, a court might not agree that he should be rewarded. That goodness you don't have a child with him.
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