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Question
Posted by: Jacob | 2010/05/24

How can someone who has everything be depressed?

My sister has been in a private hospital for a few days now because of depression. I don''t understand how she can be suffering from depression. My parents gave her everything she wanted (within their limits), they''ve stood by her no matter what she''s done (even through the drugs she was doing), they paid for her to study further, she did well at school and although she was not very popular at school because she was a bit of a freak but now that she''s out and she''s grown up a bit she''s very popular. She has a better paying job than I do, my parents don''t expect her to contribute towards the household, and even though she''s been physically abusive towards my mother, my parents are still supporting her future. Me on the otherhand, I didn''t do well at school, never abused my parents (although my father did emotionally abuse me) , started working so pay for my own studies, didn''t buy my own car ( my parents bought a car for the ousehold and put it under my name) but I worked to get it fixed. I''ve always been respectful to my parents, didn''t throw my partying and experiments in their faces, was expected to contribute to the household and yet they don''t help me- they never offered to pay for my studies, they''re unhappy with the job I have (well it''s the best I can do considering I never got any qualifications), they''ve never bragged about me as much as they do my sister, I''ve never been offered half the things my sister have, I have depression but they still don''t care. So how can someone who got everything she wanted out of life be so unhappy?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I understand that you feel puzzled, but I have known some highly depressed millionaires and oil sheiks, and some very cheerful folks living in total poverty - depression has nothing to do with your finaicial and material circumstances. But it sounds like she was spoilt, and of course the drugs did her no good, either.
And indeed, maybe she is dissatisfied and unhappy rather than depressed. One of the penalties of being spoilt in that way is to assume that you should always get everything you want, and to feel hard done by when life doesn't bother to provide this
And not a pleasant person, within a dysfunctional family.
YOu would probably be far better off on your own, independent, and not expecting anything from the dysfucntional family which will not be able to deliver. You are clearly a much nicer and more accomplished person, just unfairly unappreciated by those you look to for approval. Celebrate yourself, as you are truly worth it

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: a mother | 2010/05/25

I understand exactly what you mean.. It is actually the same way here at my home. My daughter had EXACTLY the same as well as my son. We parents don''t realize how stupid we can be because we see all of you as equals. But please learn to forgive us because sometime we can do stupid and silly things. Please talk to your folks and SORT it out otherwise you are going to lose each all of other

Reply to a mother
Posted by: Maria | 2010/05/24

There is difference between depression, meaning " the blues" , and depression the clinical illness. One does not need something to be clinically depressed about, it can also be almost purely a result of chemicals in the brain that are not functioning correctly.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/05/24

I understand that you feel puzzled, but I have known some highly depressed millionaires and oil sheiks, and some very cheerful folks living in total poverty - depression has nothing to do with your finaicial and material circumstances. But it sounds like she was spoilt, and of course the drugs did her no good, either.
And indeed, maybe she is dissatisfied and unhappy rather than depressed. One of the penalties of being spoilt in that way is to assume that you should always get everything you want, and to feel hard done by when life doesn't bother to provide this
And not a pleasant person, within a dysfunctional family.
YOu would probably be far better off on your own, independent, and not expecting anything from the dysfucntional family which will not be able to deliver. You are clearly a much nicer and more accomplished person, just unfairly unappreciated by those you look to for approval. Celebrate yourself, as you are truly worth it

Reply to cybershrink

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