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Question
Posted by: Bronnie (" ,) | 2008/09/15

How can i?

My boyfriend has a problem with talking about his feelings..When somethings wrong he just shuts up and becomes really negative and moody, Then i come along and make things worse because we end up fighting cause i ask him to talk and he does not want to. How do i get him to talk to me or look at the positive side without making it worse or is it selfish of me to want him to rely on me .i dont know how to just walk away and let him have his moment and i know its wrong i just care about him and want to help..Ive even suggested him writing it down or just holfing me and letting it out he wont once his in that mind frame he cant get out so for once i want to help instead of malinh him feel worse because he knows that he does not know how to open up.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi Bronnie,

it probably is worth talking to him about this when he is a good space. Try letting him know that you are there for him whenever he wants to talk, but that you also understand that he sometimes needs his own time and space to sort things through. He can maybe think about just letting you know when he needs that. We can't always resolve and help our partners eve when we would like to. Some things we have to sort out ourselves.

Best wishes

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Our users say:
Posted by: Kman | 2008/09/15

Hi There,

It is not selfish of you to want your bf to rely on you.
When you try and talk to him dont try and force him to talk, I am very sure he knows you are always there for him. When he is ready he will start talking to you!
Guys find it very difficult to open up and admit to not being able to express themselves properly in a relationship.

Best of Luck :-)

Reply to Kman

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