Posted by: Anonymous | 2009-06-29

homosexual 17 yr old

One of my daughter' s closest friends is a homosexual 17 yr old boy. He told his parents at the beginning of last year but they are extremely religious people who regard the practice of homosexuality as ' a sin' . I do not know what his home situation is like at present because I do not have the type of relationship with him where I can ask personal questions. However, my daughter has told me that he sneaks out at night, visits ' gay bars'  and clubs, is sexually active and has had an HIV test. I do not know his parents well but I am concerned that he is doing this behind their backs and will come to some harm I thinks he needs some sort of psychological counselling but apparently his parents do not believe in such counselling because ' all he needs to do is pray'  (according to my daughter, who has also told me that he has started experimenting with drugs). I feel I need to do something before this young boy falls into deeper trouble but I don' t know if it is my place to approach his parents. Do you have any suggestions?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi there,

You do not say where in SA you are, but in Cape Town, Triangle Project offers counselling services to the gay and lesbian community on a sliding scale including free of charge if someone is not earning. At his age he can go on his own without his parents or with you.

His parents may well not accept who he is but that is not going to change anything about his sexuality. He needs guidance and support and if his parents are not going to face up to this reality you may consider helping him by pointing him towards support services.

You can contact Triangle Project on 021 448 3812

If you are not in CT they should be able to tell you where your nearest services are.

Best wishes

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Our users say:
Posted by: Anonymous | 2009-06-30

I think even if you do not know this child welll enough, he might just need someone to talk to that won' t judge him... like a mother figure. Perhaps you and your daughter should sit down with him and just chat... he might just open up. It sounds as if he needs help and you might just be the one.

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