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Question
Posted by: Tammy | 2012/07/09

his sister stole our stuff

Hubbys sister emptied our safe- and left us with nothing. Am I asking for too much if I don''t expect him to speak to her. He feels I''m asking for too much. I can''t get through to him and he has left me feeling dead. I just pretend to be happy bcos I can''t fite anymore- just leaves me feeling alone each time.

I feel he should stand up for me , but he wouldn''t so I pretend all is well and he has no idea I''m pretending but inside of me I''m dying. I just feel like all my life morals have taken me nowhere.
The only topic he makes an effort with is sex.

We are married now for 8years with 2 children and I have to make it work for my sake and especially our children.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

That's not asking too much, that's asking too little. Aren't you talking about blatant THEFT ? Why weren't the police called to have her arrested ? If any of your money or other property is missing, you can yourself lay criminal charges against her, and even otherwise could report a break-in or theft to the police.
Don't sacrifice your morals and feelings with an immoral and selfish and uncaring man with the idea that this somehow benefits the kids - you don't want them to learn from him that its OK to steal. And you'd be reasonable in refusing to provide sex until the theft is properly resolved. Consult a lawyer and seriosuly consider whether it is wise, for your sake and that of the children, to remain with a man who loves his sister more than his wife and children, and who enthusiastically supports her career as a thief

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Our users say:
Posted by: Tammy | 2012/07/11

Dear Shrink,

We have been to an abused desk for woman and though over the phone she understood my point of view upon meeting us as a couple she felt my husband should be allowed to maintain a healthy relation with his sister. I would appreciate if you could provide me with details of a psychologist in the durban area .

After my session at the abused desk , I gave up on trusting the world, and have just started living in acceptance.

Reply to Tammy
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/07/10

That's not asking too much, that's asking too little. Aren't you talking about blatant THEFT ? Why weren't the police called to have her arrested ? If any of your money or other property is missing, you can yourself lay criminal charges against her, and even otherwise could report a break-in or theft to the police.
Don't sacrifice your morals and feelings with an immoral and selfish and uncaring man with the idea that this somehow benefits the kids - you don't want them to learn from him that its OK to steal. And you'd be reasonable in refusing to provide sex until the theft is properly resolved. Consult a lawyer and seriosuly consider whether it is wise, for your sake and that of the children, to remain with a man who loves his sister more than his wife and children, and who enthusiastically supports her career as a thief

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Maria | 2012/07/09

Are you saying that you both know his sister took your stuff and he is not willing to do anything about it? Frankly the appropriate thing to do would be to go to the police and lay a charge of theft against her. Are you saying that you now have financial problems due to this theft? Ask your husband what is more important to him - the welfare of his family, or whatever his reason is for not dealing with the situation (avoiding conflict with his sister/parents perhaps)? What sort of example is he setting for his children?

Reply to Maria

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