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Question
Posted by: Anxious | 2010/08/30

Highly Strung!!!

I seem to be highly strung ALL the time - my life feels like an emotional roller coaster most of the time. If I''m not arguing with my little sister, I''m offish and snappy with people even tho I dont mean to be (I''m sure they get the impression they irritating or bothering me.) or I''m freaking at people in the traffic.

i recently broke up with my bf, am stressed about finances and have exams coming up. my sista says i have issues but i beg to differ. she is married and has a very blazè , dont-care attitude to life and people in general. i however am a giving, caring and sensitive person and we rub each other teh wrong way all the time. she uses people and is nice to whom she choses. yet everyone thinks she''s he best thing since ice cream. she is nice to people but scandals to me about them all the time. I may be her sounding board but i think im jealous of her having all these friends and i havent seem to " crack the code"  of being nice to people all the time even if u dont like them. people call me straight forward and i''m shocked cos i really go out of my way for people :(


i am someone who takes everything seriously and expect that because we are family i shudnt have to ask can i spend time with her or her fam. she answers her phone if and when she likes but screams at me when i do the same. (i should probably be a nurse on standby)

I am single and get lonely sumetimes and when i do, would like to know i can call my sista and we can spend time together. she doesnt see it that way and feels i should deal with my issues and grow up. i end up in tears most times when we argue because i get so angry at her!! I mean really now. she is 5 years younger than me but acts like the big sista and constantly badmouths me to other people.

i know i am sensitive (I take offense when people MAKE A HABIT of not answering their cellphones - or maybe its just my calls they dont answer, or my imagination.) i sumtimes think i am such a horrible person that no1 wants to be with me yet i have so many people saying how much they envy my life.

is this purely a mindset issue - why do i see things in such a negative light all the time? how do i change to being positive and y am i so unhappy with me most of the times?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

OK, so you're stressed at present, not handling it well, and tending to take it out on other people. See a counsellor to work out better ways of handling this all.
If your sistwer is married, why does her behaviour, whatever it is, bother you so much ? Why isn't your own life more interesting to you ? She has no power except what you choose to give her. And she does sound right, that you do sound rather immature in the way you rage about her.
If you do so by phone, isn't it natural and understandable if she chooses not to accept your phone-calls - why would she want to take them ? Its not that you're a horrible person, but, from your own description, you sound like someone who at times behaves in an unpleasant way, which drives people away.
This sounds like a somewhat exggerated version of a common situation in adolescence, and you're right about it being a mindset issue - fortunately, good counselling, especially of the CBT form, can really greatly help this.

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4
Our users say:
Posted by: C | 2010/08/31

well then how does one grow up? What is CBT? where do i find a good counsellor?

Reply to C
Posted by: beth | 2010/08/31

didnt read ur story all of it but u sound like a selfish one who needs att..give urself attention and stop stressing everyone aroundu..im sure ur sister is also tired of ur behaviour and u sound jealous of her...

Reply to beth
Posted by: Artifical Intelligence Has Won | 2010/08/30

bitch....... PLEASE!

its sexual frustration you need more sex!

Reply to Artifical Intelligence Has Won
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/08/30

OK, so you're stressed at present, not handling it well, and tending to take it out on other people. See a counsellor to work out better ways of handling this all.
If your sistwer is married, why does her behaviour, whatever it is, bother you so much ? Why isn't your own life more interesting to you ? She has no power except what you choose to give her. And she does sound right, that you do sound rather immature in the way you rage about her.
If you do so by phone, isn't it natural and understandable if she chooses not to accept your phone-calls - why would she want to take them ? Its not that you're a horrible person, but, from your own description, you sound like someone who at times behaves in an unpleasant way, which drives people away.
This sounds like a somewhat exggerated version of a common situation in adolescence, and you're right about it being a mindset issue - fortunately, good counselling, especially of the CBT form, can really greatly help this.

Reply to cybershrink

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