Our expert says:
OK, so you're stressed at present, not handling it well, and tending to take it out on other people. See a counsellor to work out better ways of handling this all.
If your sistwer is married, why does her behaviour, whatever it is, bother you so much ? Why isn't your own life more interesting to you ? She has no power except what you choose to give her. And she does sound right, that you do sound rather immature in the way you rage about her.
If you do so by phone, isn't it natural and understandable if she chooses not to accept your phone-calls - why would she want to take them ? Its not that you're a horrible person, but, from your own description, you sound like someone who at times behaves in an unpleasant way, which drives people away.
This sounds like a somewhat exggerated version of a common situation in adolescence, and you're right about it being a mindset issue - fortunately, good counselling, especially of the CBT form, can really greatly help this.
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