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Question
Posted by: Charles | 2009/11/11

HELP PLEASE

I need some advise, I was married for 40 years, the last 15 year we had no sex due to wife'  s illness, so maturbation took the place of intercourse for me. The wife has since passed away, have met some ladies and matters proceeded to get intimate with both separately of course. The problem is I get a reasonable erection, but as soon as I try to enter the erection fails. We have tried on many ocassions and also the same. Now we have tried for her to masturabte me but that also does not work. I can cum only when I masturbate myself. Please tell me how can I go forward and enjoy normal sexual experiences. I am 63years old on BP tables and a bit over weight.
Please help before I cut this thing off!!
PS: Have tried Viagra, Levitra, Maxmore and some others no different.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

owing to the fact that you have tried Viagra, your problem may not be Erectile Dysfunction (ED) but may be stress related. in this sense, during a sexual encounter, express your anxieties to your partner and rather than focusing on the need for penetration focus on outer sex and touch. once you are in a safe space, with mutual respect and arousal, you might be able to offer penetrative sex.

this may take a number of attempts. thus be patient with yourself and your penis. and enjoy every minute of the sexual encounter - every kiss and caress!

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Opposite | 2009/11/15

Hi, I' m also 63 + had been sexually inactive 4 yrs since my divorce. Mine seem to work the opposite. When I masturbate I take ages to come + my erection is not altogether full. 3mths ago I became sexually active again with a ladyfriend. b4 having sex my erection is already much better that when I masturbate. Once I enter her it' s a rock hard full erection all the way, obviously from the excitement + anticipation. B4 we did it the 1st. time I told her about my weak erection + masturbation but we were so surprised when it came to doing the deed, better than expected. Maybee yours is just a psycological prob due to performance worry. The fact that masturbation not being a problem tells me there can' t be anything seriously wrong. Ours just gets better all the time. She' s a sexy 57yo. + sex is better now than it was when I was 40. Good luck.

Reply to Opposite
Posted by: sexologist | 2009/11/12

owing to the fact that you have tried Viagra, your problem may not be Erectile Dysfunction (ED) but may be stress related. in this sense, during a sexual encounter, express your anxieties to your partner and rather than focusing on the need for penetration focus on outer sex and touch. once you are in a safe space, with mutual respect and arousal, you might be able to offer penetrative sex.

this may take a number of attempts. thus be patient with yourself and your penis. and enjoy every minute of the sexual encounter - every kiss and caress!

Reply to sexologist
Posted by: Charles | 2009/11/11

Many thanks for your comments, have taken note

Reply to Charles
Posted by: woman | 2009/11/11

Sorry, I forgot to add that you should please remember that HIV/AIDS knows no age, and you should still be careful. Getting tested with a potential partner is the smart thing to do. And she will appreciate it too.

Although statistics in South Africa is vague for your age group, research shows that up to 15% of new AIDS cases come from the age group 60+.

Reply to woman
Posted by: Woman | 2009/11/11

Hello Charles, I think you should make an appointment with a Urologist to have the tools checked out. A professional would be able to give you real help and advice. Most men suffer from erectile dysfunction sometime during their life, you are not strange.

Also do start going to gym or walk or run,take extra vitamins, and as you become more fit, and yes, loose some kilo' s, you will start feeling young and fit again. 63 is still young and you do have the capability to have many years of great sex ahead if you look after your self.

Reply to Woman

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