Our expert says:
OK, you've already taken the first and most essential step - you have recognized that there is a problem, and that you need to change. Without that, nothing else could help. As you've discovered, bitching and moaning can be an almost automatic reaction to marriage problems, but it is useless - it solves none of the problems, and makes both of you feel worse.
The best bet for changing this unhelpful habit would be counselling, perhaps some individual sessions, then perhaps some joint sessions, for the pair of you - not only to deal with the most obvious problems, but to brush up your joint skills at solving problems more effectively
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.