Our expert says:
These early, unrealistic "loves" can be very disturbing. Its really sad that at 14, kids aren't enjoying being kids, but are copying adults and having love affairs, and being players and played. I hope you didn't encourage the love affair, as it was so likely to lead to tears or worse.
You can usefully make it clear that you're sorry her feelings have been hurt, but that she must not allow this to disturb her exams ( no school would accept this as an excuse for failure . If necessary, let her see a counsellor to get this into perspective. Don't do anything on your side to encourage her to build it into some enormous drama.
No girl of 14 is emotionally capable of having a deep emotional love affair, and no boy of around that age is, either.
For whatever reason,she seems to have formed wildly unrealistic expectations for the affair, and is hurt by the damage to her illusions. Don't get too involved, and encourage her to mix with a group of friends and NOT to have a close girl-boy relationship. Concentrate your help on her preparation for the exams, and to encourage her to see this in perspective. She expected far too much from a boy-child, and both of them seem to have got out of their depth.
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