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Question
Posted by: Mickey | 2013-01-21

HATEFULL FEELINGS TOWARDS SISTER IN LAW

Hi my husband is working for his brother in law, a while a go he resigned due to the unhumane hours they have to work, starts from 7:00 in the morning and only gets home at 10:00. During the period that my husband was not working for my brother in law my sister in law didn''t greet me or my children and ingnored us flat. My husband and brother in law work throught their differences and my husband is working for him again. Now my sister in law is all friendly again. But although I am friendly with her inside me I hate her so much for the person she is and the hurt that she caused with her attitude. I do not like to feel this way but is seems I am consumed with hate for her when I see her of even hear her name, I despise her for the person she is. She''s my husband sister and close family? I tried to change my feelings towards her but it just seems if this hateful thoughts I felt for her wont go away. Please help me, this is so difficult for me because I am not a person who used to held something against other people especially those near to me. All I can say is that her attitude was very hurtful to me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

One of the snags when one goes to work for a relative is that they may exploit you, and exploit your relationship. Is it his sister who was ignoring you at that time ? Sounds bad manners.
But why waste effort and energy in HATING her ? What she did was maybe unkind or thoughtless, but not necessarily hateful. It sounds as though these unhelpful feelings of hate are becoming a bad habit, and counselling would be a good idea to help you rid yourself of them. As I think you recognize, they're far more harmful to you than to anyone else.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Mickey | 2013-01-21

Thanks for the reply, it is my husbands sister. I will follow your advice and start to see it in the right context, maybe it is just her way of showing her disapprovement.

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