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Question
Posted by: Needtoknow | 2010/07/08

Has he got Low Libido or am I the problem?? How do I tell??

Does my boyfriend have a low libido or is it me? He can go without sex for up to 2 months at a time and until I make a move, nothing happens. It seems to never be on his mind.

We are in our late 20''s and in a good solid relationship (6.5yrs long). I believe we are just about perfectly matched except for this issue which keeps popping up its head.

When we first got together, sex was a regular occurance and when we do have sex, its amazing. Please understand I''m not completely sex-crazed but just can''t understand why doesnt he want me more often? Its REALLY affecting my self esteem and even I''m starting to notice and enjoy other mens interest in me.

I''m really a good looking women, but have even started going to gym to make myself more attractive to him. Thats made no difference. When I go out, I get lots of attention from other guys, and my boyfriends before him couldnt get enough of me.

Yes, my man is wonderful and caring in every way and I want to marry him but need to understand why doesnt he WANT me sexually!

Overall, he is incredibly health, but he smokes weed on a daily basis - about twice a day during the week and more on the weekend. He has been doing this for years, and I have stopped fighting it, even though I hate it. When I suggest that its affecting his libido, he gets really angry and completely rules out the idea.

He says he doesnt know why he''s like this. He says I must do more to work on turning him on but when I do wear sexy underwear or clothes, all that I get from it, is MAYBE a compliment, that''s if he notices.

So, please can you advise how I can get to the bottom of this! Its not going to go away, and I dont want it to destroy the amazing thing that we have!

Thank you for your time!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Dagga/weed actually reduces the sex drive and adversely affects the reproductive system. You can consult a professional. SASHA helpline (0860 100 262)

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: XXX | 2010/07/08

At your age I would expect you to be bonking on a very regular basis.I cannot comment on the effects of weed but I guess it could have a negative impact.
He might need a medical check up just to be sure-is he stressed for example ?
You don''t need to be sex-crazed to want normal,healthy regular sex.
You both need this to be sorted asap otherwise it will become more of an issue as time goes on.Don''t let it effect your self-esteem,you say you are attractive,look after yourself and want sex-nothing wrong there.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: razo | 2010/07/08

I dont think he''s cheating weed can increase your sex drive for me it does, but for some it can lower their sex drive like your bf, i suggest you sit with him and chat about how this is affecting you and the relationship.

Reply to razo
Posted by: zan | 2010/07/08

i think tht he might be cheating on u...........

Reply to zan
Posted by: THE PRIDE | 2010/07/08

JUST ME 2CENTS WORTH -
I ALSO SMOKE WEED AND HAVE BEEN SMOKING FOR A LONG TIME NOW AND SMOKE AS MUCH AS YOUR MAN DOES, AND OUT OF PERSONAL EXPERINCE IT DOES AFFECT YOUR SEX DRIVE, IF I SMOKE I NEED TO CHILL FOR A WHILE BEFORE ME AND MY PARNTER CAN MAKE LOVE AND EVEN THEN SOMETIMES I WILL GO SOFT WHILE WE ARE BUSY OR I CANT CUM AS IT DE-SENSATISES ME, BUT THAT ONLY ONCE I HAVE SMOKED NORMALLY ME AND MY PARTNER GO AT IT 3 TO 5 TIMES A DAY. I DONT THINK THIS IS THE ROOT OF YOUR PROBLEM BUT THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE INTERSETED IN MY EXPERINCE.

Reply to THE PRIDE
Posted by: sexologist | 2010/07/08

Dagga/weed actually reduces the sex drive and adversely affects the reproductive system. You can consult a professional. SASHA helpline (0860 100 262)

Reply to sexologist

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