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Question
Posted by: Tired | 2010-08-31

Grow up

If u being told that u''r immature and need to grow up how exactly do u do that ???

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

With the assistance of a psychotherapist or counsellor.
I don't encourage advertising of individual shrinks or docs in this forum, for various good reasons. But calling the Depression/Anxiety Helpline ( number on this page ) or FAMSA, can help you find a selection of counsellors / psychotherapists in your area.
As said, if you are a student, check out what may be available through a student counselling service.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

7
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2010-08-31

Also consider the possibility that this person is just wrong. Challenge her, and ask her how she thinks you should change.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: CTMOM | 2010-08-31

Examine your behaviour when they tell you this, what are you doing? Why do you feel the need to act that way? Are you just being funny and they not getting it or are you throwing a tantrum for not getting your way?

You can fix this if it needs fixing. Just stop, think and then act.

Reply to CTMOM
Posted by: Tired | 2010-08-31

I am based in Centurion and no, I''m not a student but would welcome any help in any form. I agree with you that it depends on who makes the comment. i am constantly told by the same person to grow up and we at loggerheads most times. :(

Reply to Tired
Posted by: Maria | 2010-08-31

If you tell us where you are someone on the forum might be able to refer you. You can google for psychologists in your area, or look at www dot psychotherapy dot co dot za. Look for someone who says they work with CBT / personal growth / interpersonal relationships. If you are a student you may have counselling services available on campus. Good luck!

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Tired | 2010-08-31

Tx Maria for your prompt reply. where woudl i find a good counsellor?

Reply to Tired
Posted by: Maria | 2010-08-31

It is difficult to answer your question without knowing the context. Assuming you are talking about yourself, are you often told to grow up or was this a once off? How old are you? Do you trust the judgement of the person who made the comment?

People who are mature are not self centred and selfish. They can put the needs of others ahead of their own. They have an established moral code that they live by and measure their own behaviour according to this code rather than according to what they feel like at the time. They negotiate rather than demand.

A good starting point would be to think about the way you think and behave. Can you improve your behaviour? Think about situations in which you behaved in an immature way, and rehearse in your mind how you could have handled things better.

It might also be an idea to see a counsellor for a couple of sessions to help you clarify all of this in your own mind.



Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-08-31

With the assistance of a psychotherapist or counsellor.
I don't encourage advertising of individual shrinks or docs in this forum, for various good reasons. But calling the Depression/Anxiety Helpline ( number on this page ) or FAMSA, can help you find a selection of counsellors / psychotherapists in your area.
As said, if you are a student, check out what may be available through a student counselling service.

Reply to cybershrink

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