Our expert says:
You are going to a social club, which has a fair number of members, one of whom is yourt ex ? Or you are going to this club WITH your ex ? If the latter, why is this extra closeness necessary ? Couldn't you go with your present bf ? It doesn't have to be his idea --- that's a dodgy excuse. And surely he wouldn't insist that his entire family, or even any members of it, MUST joion this particular activity. Does he never ever go out anywhere without them ? I don't understand, or don't feel convinced by your reasons for excluding him from this group --- it sounds far more as though you would want to enjoy it without him. You talk, not of being a member of the group and enjoying the other members, but of going with yout ex, and enjoying being with your ex, almost as though the group is a convenient excuse for being with the ex.
Even if you have no feelings ( that you are aware of ) for your Ex, you're aware that He has feelings for you. If you don't intend this contact to go further, why give him hope unnecessarily ? Surely you are leading him on, behaviourally, even if you SAY you don't intend to do so.
As you recognize, he is bound to find out, as there are too many mutual friends for it to remain secret ( and surely it should not be a secret ? )
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