Our expert says:
Opposites sometimes start by attracting, and then repelling each other. Differences that seemed refreshingly diferent can become annoying in time. And while it seems fair to expect ourselves to be equally effective in all areas of life, this is actually uncommon, especially when different skills and attitudes are needed in these fields of ativity.
Some of us start out by finding it harder to trust others ; others of us have bad experiences earlier in life which convince us that it is risky to trust others.
As you are recognizing, one of the problems with excessive jealousy and suspiciousness is that it can eventually create the very situation you fear, even when it was really highly unlikely before this.
Consider either or both individual counselling to explore and help you to change your basic problems of trust ( CBT style counselling would probably be most effective, as it aims at changing unhelpful assumptions like that ) and perhaps some couples counselling for the pair of you, to improve how each of you handle any crises or issues which arise
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