Our expert says:
She doesn't need to spend every evening with you, but should keep to whatever arrangement is agreed, and not keep you waiting. I don't understand how she has been allowed to build up a R 200,000 debt to you, or to drive YOUR car while visiting these apparently irresistable friends. Sounds awfully much as though she is using you.
In your description, there's loads of benefits for her, and none for you. Consult a lawyer and ask for her plan to pay back her debts as soon as posible, and withdraw her rights to use your car - if she finds thiese reasonable steps offensive, then she proves that this was all about using you, and not a real relationship at all.
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