Our expert says:
Bella, sorry for the delay, I had to have your message translated to make sure I understood all that you said. I must also apologise but I will have to reply in English as Afrikaans is quite limited.
It does sound quite confusing because it wasn't so long ago that things seemed 'fine' to you...and it is almost as if this is a different man to the one you married! It's even more difficult for you because it sounds like he becomes defensive when you talk about your concerns. I do wonder what is going on for him and why such a sudden change. You need to balance between the other important things in the marriage that you love, and the risk to this if you dig your heels in an insist on seeing someone professionally. I think that is it reasonable that you expect a certain amount of physical affection if this was there before and it is reasonable also to have answers as to why this has changed.
If you would like to see someone professionally, you can get a local name from the SASHA helpline 0860 100 262
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