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Question
Posted by: pam | 2011/09/20

fustrated

okay im in a commited relationship with a guy for 2 years now, we have the same religion where no sex before marriage allowed. problem is, im always satisfying "  his needs"  , oral etc. and i reached the point now where im so fustrated, ive told him recently how i felt, was embarrassing. He said he doesnt "  do oral"  and that he cant do anything now because of exams cause he has no time. i cannot even masturbate, its forbidden and i will feel guilty. im really having a high sex drive, im constantly aroused, how can i shut it off?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

They're wants, not needs. I don't understand - in your religion, YOU are forbiden to masturbate yourself, but its OK to masturbate him ? And he has no time to even think of satisfying or pleasing you, but plenty of time for you to service him ?
he sounds so selfish that he's a bad choice of partner anyway.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Caro | 2011/09/21

Ask him then if someone else can oral you seeing as it is acceptable but he wont do it. Dont marry a guy who wont oral you anyway - you may always feel that youre missing out on something. And believe me - you will be.

Reply to Caro
Posted by: dw | 2011/09/21

Good grief, you he ''cant do oral'' neither can you!!! See how he likes that.

Reply to dw
Posted by: Maria | 2011/09/21

Your boyfriend sounds really, really selfish. Do you want to spend your life with a guy who bends the rules to suit himself but could care less about your needs? And for crying out loud, how can oral sex be acceptable in your religion but masturbation isn''t?

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/09/21

They're wants, not needs. I don't understand - in your religion, YOU are forbiden to masturbate yourself, but its OK to masturbate him ? And he has no time to even think of satisfying or pleasing you, but plenty of time for you to service him ?
he sounds so selfish that he's a bad choice of partner anyway.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Asking? | 2011/09/20

Which religion allows you to satisfy his needs but does not allow you to satisfy yourself (at the same time forbidding sex until marriage). Surely what you are doing to your BF is also out of bounds!

Can you both not discuss this with your church leader?

Reply to Asking?

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