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Question
Posted by: Pink | 2010/03/24

Frustrated

My ex boyfriend of 4years impregnated some woman last year and he told me 6months after the lady told her..and he claimed that he was drunk and never wanted to hurt me....we broke up after i heard the horible news....i moved on and found some one 3months later ...and i broke up with that person as well...due to our differences....and met few guys who disappointed and lied to me....and we kept contact with the 4years ex.... i have always loved him and felt comfortable around him....we have tried to get back together and January and i pulled out as i couldnt take it...and now we are in talks to try again...but ..part of me wants to go back and the other part doesnt...my family and friends ..has encouraged me to go back but ..i have doubts...im struggling to come to terms with letting him go...how can i handle this

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Drunk isn't an excuse ( he chose to get drunk and be with her ) and the child isn't "accidental" - knocking over a glass of milk is an accident, a child is not.
See a counsellor and work out your own problems, and move on. There were good reasons for your having chosen to leave him, and they haven't changed

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: qwerty | 2010/03/25

Has he changed? I mean, can you honestly say he is a different person to the person he was when he cheated on you..? And being drunk is NEVER an excuse! There''s no such thing as cheating " accidentally" .

The fact that you are having any doubts at all, is quite telling. And there is now the added complication that he has a child he is responsible for... Do you want / need that in your life?

Just think about it logically, and remind yourself of all the reasons it wouldn''t work (and in fact, HASN''T between you two, and be strong! It might be rough at first, but in the end, when you meet a wonderful man who will be faithful to you, it''ll all be worth it.

Reply to qwerty
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/03/25

Drunk isn't an excuse ( he chose to get drunk and be with her ) and the child isn't "accidental" - knocking over a glass of milk is an accident, a child is not.
See a counsellor and work out your own problems, and move on. There were good reasons for your having chosen to leave him, and they haven't changed

Reply to cybershrink

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