Posted by: Frustrated | 2009/11/25


My faince and I had a FANTASTIC sex life. I found out a month ago that he is visiting sex chatrooms. I wanted to end the relationship and he promissed that he will not do it again. I forgave him and we are trying to work on our relationship (everyone deserves at least one chance to redeem himself). Since that our sex life is non existent... Then I found out that he would watch porn and then wank when I left for work. He said he also stopped doing that. At one stage I could get him turned on by just taking of my bra but lately, I could walk around the house wearing the sexiest underwear or even NAKED and he would still not be turned on. I would make it clear to him that I " need"  him and he would still " reject"  me. Yes, I do play with my toys etc and would come like a fountain... but that does not satisfy my emotional needs. I told him how I feel and what I need, we are seeing a couples counsellor as well but still nothing. What am I to do? It doesn' t seem like he is interested in trying to fix the sexual part of our relationship.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

If this relationship is destined to progress one would need to look at whether there is still a bond or not that ties the two of you together. Sex should always be on the "roof"and not inthe foundation as this will not allow the two of you to share love ,trust ,respect , companionship and other mutual spaces.
It seems like the demands of stopping and promising to be a good boy have started a possible rebellion and your partner has not addressed his sexual needs /fantasies .
A psychosexual therapist would assist him and to differentiate any possible addiction and thereby start to address underlying sexual issues.

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Our users say:
Posted by: GU | 2009/12/01

At least he is watching porn and checking out sites online. Much better than actually going out and doing it with someone else. Perhaps your demands that he stops doing the things he likes and by you restricting him is putting him off wanting sex with you. It is Why not watch porn with him, or surf the net with him. That way he satisfies his needs and you dont have to worry that he is being " emotionally unfaithful"  to you. GIVE THE MAN A BREAK.

Reply to GU
Posted by: Top Cat | 2009/11/25

I think it is time run, no need to stray in that kind of relationship. Get some man who will adore you.

Reply to Top Cat
Posted by: Lady man | 2009/11/25


At this stage in life I cannot believe that there are still men outside that say no to a woman who are bigtime willing.

Frustrated. Maybe he is still recovering from the fact that you know what he was doing. I also think you must leave and get someone who will be able to fill your needs. But before you take this step, try talking to him first and see what is his reason. Say to him that you will help him with the wanking he should wait for you.

Reply to Lady man
Posted by: PAUL | 2009/11/25

Dump him. This going to cause you endless problems in future. Get someone who cares and love you.

Reply to PAUL
Posted by: Anon!! | 2009/11/25

You need to call me..

Reply to Anon!!

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