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Question
Posted by: Cony | 2011/08/23

Friends &  money

Good morning Doc

I bumped my best friend''s car into a garage door during the weekend &  i offered to pay for the damages as i was feeling so bad about it. it was a terable mistake, one that i know that no amount of money can fix. She just sent me a qoutation of R2000 of which I don''t have that kind of money, when i offered to pay for the damages I didn''t think it was gonna be this much,the car is not that much damaged it''s just some minor scraches which can be fixed with a polish,it does''nt need to be painted.

I''ve tryed speaking to her about getting a cheaper qoute but it looks as if she wants nothing less for her car, I know money matters are the serious factor in most friendships &  i really would like to pay for my mistake but not that much. She has also made mistakes in the past that i had to pay because of her mistakes and i''ve never held any gradge towards her. Please help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Well, usually money does enable a car to be fixed. It sounds as though she is rather more upset about this accident than you think justified, and you appear, understandably, to suspect that she has obtained an inflated quote that is far too expensive. Its common practise to get at least three quotes, to be able to pick the lowest. Ask her to allow you to get some more quotes.
Maybe you need legal adice, too. If she wanted to, I suppose she could take you to the Small Claims Court, but the court would expect her to provide three in dependent quotes to show that the one she is insisting on is reasonable.
If in the past you have paid for HER mistakes, maybe she has come to expect this, without thinking whether she may have been exploiting your friendship.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Motlalentwa | 2011/08/23

Legal advice will not assist but will ruin your friendship if you still value it. in a normal situation she was suppose to give you the car to fix it, that way you could have come out cheaper. You caused damages to the car, it is better to go out of your way and repair it, atleast your eyes are now open.

Reply to Motlalentwa
Posted by: Kelly | 2011/08/23

Unfortunatly, and I’ ve learnt this the HARD way, cars are expensive and even the most minor damage can cost a fortune. It is quite selfish of her, knowing that you have money issues, that she is not prepared to get a cheaper quote. As CS says, it is common practice to get several quotes- after all, she isn’ t going to pick the first insurance quote she gets? If she INSISTS on this quote, ask her if she will accept payment of R400 or R500 over a few months. If she doesn’ t then explain to her that she will just have to wait until you have the money. A real friend will understand- our friend broke a door handle on our vintage car (costs R1000 to fix) but we haven’ t accepted payment from him. If she STILL doesn’ t allow to for leniency, then you’ re going to have to tell her that you didn’ t want to stoop low, you wanted to sort this out, but please remember the times she did this and that, and you were the one who helped her out. Friendship shouldn’ t be about money, so she should understand.

Reply to Kelly
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/08/23

Well, usually money does enable a car to be fixed. It sounds as though she is rather more upset about this accident than you think justified, and you appear, understandably, to suspect that she has obtained an inflated quote that is far too expensive. Its common practise to get at least three quotes, to be able to pick the lowest. Ask her to allow you to get some more quotes.
Maybe you need legal adice, too. If she wanted to, I suppose she could take you to the Small Claims Court, but the court would expect her to provide three in dependent quotes to show that the one she is insisting on is reasonable.
If in the past you have paid for HER mistakes, maybe she has come to expect this, without thinking whether she may have been exploiting your friendship.

Reply to cybershrink

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