Posted by: Liz | 2009-07-07

? for Cybershrink (posting feel boyfriend' s pain post break-up)

Hi Cybershrink

Yes, I think I am in habit with him. Habits are hard to break.

I have to ask why do you think the man I have met is more like a potential friend only?

I like him because he is honest (did not try and take advantage of me as it would have been so easy). We have been honest about our break-ups and agreed to embark on nothing, not even friendship (for fear of breaking the romantic anticipation/spark). Our companies do business so we see each other often, sometimes daily but we keep it light and friendly. Chat on the phone, cell and via E-mail.

We agreed to get over our respective relationships and take it from there.

Is this not the kind of man a woman would wish for? I liked him the moment I met him. My first thought was he is such a friendly and nice person. Has a great sense of humour (so do I). Intelligent and we just get on so well. He is no fool and has been around the block and then some. My ex is gorgeous if truth be told. This chap is much shorter than me and certainly not gorgeous. But...there is just something about him. He also has lovely manners and treats you like a lady at all times. I like that.

So, you think it may only be friendship. Maybe. But please tell me why.


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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Indeed, habits are hard to break.
Honesty and frankness are useful qualities in a friend. I thought your concerns, expressed in you earlier message, suggested some degree of lack of suitability as a lover / long0term intimate partner. If not, why is here a problem, and why did you break up ?
Try to avoid the bouncing some folks get trapped into, when you remember all the reasons for being apart whenever you get together, and remember all o the reasons for being together, when you're apart !

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