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Question
Posted by: Jeff | 2010/07/23

Fiance says she needs space

Ok, so we went through a rough patch a while ago and I vowed to change my behavior. I was bit selfish ect. So I started doing special things for her. Notes in her lunch, bought her roses, washed and combed her hair ect. All went well until she said to me today: There will be time where I don''t want you to faff over me and I need my space sometimes. Huh? It was never like that!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe there was at first a time when you gave her less attention than she wanted ; and now maybe a little bit more than she wants ; and you just need to get the dose right ? maybe she wants some time to herself, as you might well want for yourself - but its important to discuss this sort of issue together and specifically.
Some people only know what they don't want, when you give it to them

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5
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2010/07/23

Jeff, to figure out what she does want, read a book called The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It will give both of you insight into what each of you need in order to feel loved.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Jeff | 2010/07/23

Thanks Maria. That might be it.

Reply to Jeff
Posted by: Maria | 2010/07/23

Maybe you are overdoing things just a bit?

Reply to Maria
Posted by: Lin | 2010/07/23

It may seem like a mystery regarding WHAT women want. Ask her to explain to you what she wants. Ask her to tell you when she needs her time to herself.
It sounds as if she doesn''t really know what she wants...

Reply to Lin
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/07/23

Maybe there was at first a time when you gave her less attention than she wanted ; and now maybe a little bit more than she wants ; and you just need to get the dose right ? maybe she wants some time to herself, as you might well want for yourself - but its important to discuss this sort of issue together and specifically.
Some people only know what they don't want, when you give it to them

Reply to cybershrink

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