Our expert says:
Hold on and work through this set o problems, it'll be worth it. The hospital should have a shrink see your mother to assess her mental state and the reasons for her riskily uncooperative behaviour.
And now you have an appointment and will be seing a counsellor at Groote Schuur --- good. You are still a very nice person, just finding it harder to show this, in the current situation. Put the relationship onnhold while more things get sorted out.
If mom lives with you and is so wasteful ( again, I wonder whether she has always been like this, or whether she might be dementing ? Maybe she needs to be in care ) you may need to keep food and whatever else she wastes, locked away from her, leaving out only the minimum she needs before you return at night. And maybe find another good home for the expensive dog ? And if you think she contributed to the suicide of her huisband and the attempt of one son, don't add yourself to that dismal list. You deserve better, and should work with your own counsellor to find the best ways to arange for this
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