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Question
Posted by: assy | 2011/07/11

feeling so lost

I dont know what is wrong with me. I feel so lost. I put my son that is a drug addict out of my house. he came from rehab and when straight into drugs again. I met this wonderfull guy. just want to be with me. hold me and cuddle me a lot.but I feel so insecure as he tells me about his previous girlfriends. he ask me if it is okay as he tells me as he want me to know everything.
I am divorced for 3 years and had a bit of a hard time with previous relationships.  this guy slept by me saturday after being on bussiness. went home yesterday. came back again saying he cant stay away from me. but he must sort out his life.
if i tell him i like him he say i must not , but he tells me all the time that he love me and care for me. i am very confused and feel lost and lonely.what must i do

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe there are a few too many things happening at around the same time, for you to feel confident in how to handle them all. Sadly, if your son is a drug addict and has wasted his time at rehab by going right back onto drugs again, it is fair for you to have put him out. It is your home, and you are entitled to make reasonable rules, including the rule that anyone staying there as a guest ( as he was ) does not do drugs.
Its understandable that you would want comfort from someone like this friend, but it sounds as though he has a lot to sort out in his own life before he could offer to be a reliable support in yours. Its fair to want to be honest with a new partner, but I wodner about his apparent need and anxiety to tell you all about his relationship past. Maybe he does care about you, but recognizes that he is not altogether personally in a state to be able to be fair and fully available for you, and perhaps also recognizes that right now you are really vulnerable, and should not be taken advantage of.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/07/11

Maybe there are a few too many things happening at around the same time, for you to feel confident in how to handle them all. Sadly, if your son is a drug addict and has wasted his time at rehab by going right back onto drugs again, it is fair for you to have put him out. It is your home, and you are entitled to make reasonable rules, including the rule that anyone staying there as a guest ( as he was ) does not do drugs.
Its understandable that you would want comfort from someone like this friend, but it sounds as though he has a lot to sort out in his own life before he could offer to be a reliable support in yours. Its fair to want to be honest with a new partner, but I wodner about his apparent need and anxiety to tell you all about his relationship past. Maybe he does care about you, but recognizes that he is not altogether personally in a state to be able to be fair and fully available for you, and perhaps also recognizes that right now you are really vulnerable, and should not be taken advantage of.

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