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Question
Posted by: bobo | 2010/01/12

Feeling out

Im involved with a divorcee guy, so there is one thing that bodering me, it is his family and relatives, when we go visit them, they always asking about, how are the kids and ex wife, they ignore me,or i can say they don' t accept that their brother has moved on with somebody now, the only questions that they ask is kids and ex wife, ' Tell Portia (ex wife' s name) that we still love her" . I just feel like im out of the agenda,though im trying to build a good relationship with them,but in vain. Must i stop going to visit or what?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Maybe this is because though HE divorced his ex-wife, he didn't divorce his kids, and the family divorced nobody - so they know the ex wife and children, and remain interested in them - and they dotn't yet know you well enough to have much conversation about you. And besides, you are there so they can talk with you, and don't need to ask him about you.
However, what you describe is impolite of them, and you should discuss it with your boyfriend, and he should speak to them to remind them that this feels undeservedly bad for you.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/01/12

Maybe this is because though HE divorced his ex-wife, he didn't divorce his kids, and the family divorced nobody - so they know the ex wife and children, and remain interested in them - and they dotn't yet know you well enough to have much conversation about you. And besides, you are there so they can talk with you, and don't need to ask him about you.
However, what you describe is impolite of them, and you should discuss it with your boyfriend, and he should speak to them to remind them that this feels undeservedly bad for you.

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