Our expert says:
OK, it's not admirable under such circumstances to have an emotional ( but not physical )affair with a friend, but the abusiveness of your husband before that was significantly worse. In discussing it with him, you can emphasize that while you also wish to put all this unpleasant phase behind you, he needs to recognize that he was at least emotionally abusive towards you before this emotional attachment, so you should share responsibility for things having gone wrong, and be prepared to forgive each other and yourselves.
I would also worry that he might be using this as an excuse to feel entitled to wander, himself, as the not wearing the ring is a bit ominous.
As your husband is apparently open to the idea of seeking help, have you spoken to FAMSA about the best prices available for marriage counselling, and they may also know of some sources of low-cost help ?
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