Posted by: Layla | 2009-02-16


Hi CS!
What to do...
I' ve been with my boyfriend for a year now, I love him to bits and he says he loves me too.
The thing is he is always comparing me to other women.
I' m 24 he is 27, I' ve gained abit of weight in the past year but im not fat! or even overweight.He tells me all the time that everything about me is perfect I just have to lose some blubber ...I am size 30 but used to be 26/28, he wants me to be a size 26...
When he calls me fatty and makes ' fat jokes'  he says he is just trying to motivate me to lose weight.He even used to make fun of me being fat in front of his friends.

Also I know that there is some type of competition with him and his friends as to who' s gf is the prettiest and looks the best type of thing although he has never admitted.He even told me once his friend said he has a fat g/f! and I repeat IM NOT FAT!I have some curves but by no means fat and then he starts making me feel this small by telling me what not to eat and to exercise and stuff and pointing out to women in the street with skimpy clothes on asking me if I can manage to look like that.

I think for him I just need to lose some weight so that his friends have nothing to pick on with him and he would have the best looking g/f because he always says, all you have to do is lose some and you will be totally perfect and you' ll make me the happiest guy ever!

I have asked him this past weekend if I have ever said anything bad about him/ his looks or body or compared him to those guys with big shoulder and so on and that' s because I love him no matter what.So why can' t he do that for me?
Anyways he said he will try to be more sensitive but he still continues without realizing it!

Does this guy really love me?Am I wasting my time?
I' m really confused as I love him so much but he makes me feel so shit at times that I feel like crying and then he tells me im too sensitive!
What do I do???

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Our expert says:
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He should be mature enough to know that cruel and prejudiced jokes are no way to motivate anyone. And is he such a magnificant specimen of manhood that nobody criticizes him ? If he's competing with other guys about having the prettiest gf, then he is far too immature to deserve to have a gf, and at 27 such behaviour is truly pathetic. Tell him that you'd be so happy if only he would lose some height, because he'd look so much better if he were shorter.
Anyone who deliberately makes you feel so bad, is NOT loving

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Our users say:
Posted by: Lee | 2009-02-16

He sounds like an immature schoolboy with a nasty habit of putting you down! Time to think about whether he is really the one for you......

Reply to Lee
Posted by: gs | 2009-02-16

buy him a skelleton and the till him GOOD BYE - he does not love you.

Reply to gs
Posted by: C | 2009-02-16

OMG - I am a size 34 and I think I am pretty hot and so does my husband! Get rid of him. Imagine what he will say when you marry him and fall pregnant! He' s obviously into looks only and cannot appreciate you for who and what you are. Dump him and find someone who will appreciate you.

Reply to C
Posted by: cally | 2009-02-16

Honey, ditch the dumbass. You' re a size 30, that' s plenty slim...
I' m a size 28/30 too, with all the right curves, and I know I' m a pretty good package, and if my guy dared tell me I' m fat I' d kick him in the nuts and leave...
Anyway, isn' t true beauty that which comes from within? If he' s so fixated on your external looks (when you' re obviously a hottie) and not concentrating on your personality, then he isn' t worth it.
And, by the way, if he' s just letting his friends criticize you and not defending you, then you' ll always be second best to them. What are you to him, a trophy, or a bestest best friend and partner? That' s what you need to ask.

Reply to cally

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