advertisement
Question
Posted by: Melissa | 2012/11/19

Fantasise

I''m happly married for 15 years, my husband was my first and I have not had sex with any other person. But I do fantasise about other men. I feel so guilty about it, because I really love my husband and I would never cheat on him, is this normal?

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Many people, men and women, use fantasy to aid their arousal...so it is quite common. If you struggle with this emotionally (guilt), why not use the power of your imagination to allow your husband to be the person in your fantasy - whatever it is about those other men that turns you on, e.g.. your husband is your neighbor, or a fireman, or a stranger, or whatever...?

Claire - SASHA
For further information please consult SASHA’s website at www.sexualhealth.qw.co.za/dru For referral to a professional in your vicinity, please send an email to helpline.sasha@gmail.com

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

7
Our users say:
Posted by: Chris758 | 2012/11/20

Then you have nothing to worry about!! You are a normal person with normal thoughts!!

Reply to Chris758
Posted by: Melissa | 2012/11/19

Thank you for the advice XXX, I will take it to hart.

Chris758, no I do not think of other men when I''m with my husband.

Daniel, thank you for your willingness to listen.

It''s just sometimes so overwhelming to have this desires and to also love my husband so much, it feels if there is something wrong with me, because surly if you truly love someone you would not desire another. But I must say it feels better just saying.

Reply to Melissa
Posted by: XXX | 2012/11/19

I think everyone has certain fantasies but as long as we don''t act on them all is fine.You are clearly still in love with your husband,so rather than possibly stray,why not spice up your sex life with him.You probably do pretty much the same every time,so try different positions,places to do it etc.
Whilst I''m sure Daniel could offer sound advice,I would not email anyone for extra advice.What if your husband came across this,he would be devastated and can only harm your relationship.
Stay well

Reply to XXX
Posted by: Chris758 | 2012/11/19

Melissa, these things happen in life. You see someone that is just hot and sexy or somethings happen that you do not control and you fantasise about it. do you think about the other men while making love to your husband? Does that thought make you more in the mood?

Reply to Chris758
Posted by: Daniel | 2012/11/19

I can realte to what you are saying.
If you want to chat, just chat mail me daniel dot daniel 985 at gmail dot com

Reply to Daniel
Posted by: Melissa | 2012/11/19

Sometimes I think because I fantasise about it, it''s just as good as cheating.

Reply to Melissa
Posted by: Daniel | 2012/11/19

Its is normal to fantasise about others. I do the same, alsthough i have never and will never cheat.

Reply to Daniel

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement