advertisement
Question
Posted by: Broken woman | 2010/02/05

Fantacies

Why am my husband begging me to sleep with other men? It use to be a fantacy, but I am getting scared the way he carries on, we' re married for 23 jr. and are still so much in love, but he is causing me to hate our sexual encounters. What must I do??

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Dear Broken woman,

The fantacy your husband is having is not an uncommon fantacy. What is important is that it is a fantasy. Fantasy and reality are two importantly different aspects of life.

The problem here is your husband seemingly wanting to pressure you into a sexual encounter you do not wish to engage in. It would be important that your husband respect your wishes too.

What you need to do is to have an open honest talk with your husband where you express clearly to him about how you feel about his pressuring you to do something you do not wish to do and how it makes you feel.

It may be helpful to consider seeing a sex therapist to assist you with the communication that needs to happen if you feel you cannot manage it on your own.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

11
Our users say:
Posted by: Casper | 2010/02/10

You and your husband need to talk about the core of this fantasy, he is definately not open about the whole truth, trust me on this, I am a man and find this strange if there is no hidden agenda.

Reply to Casper
Posted by: bryn | 2010/02/07

He is scared you will find outthat he slept with someone else. If you do find out he will be able to say " well - so have yiou" 

Reply to bryn
Posted by: Broken Husband | 2010/02/05

Broken women did he mention with whom he wants you to sleep with. Is itgoing to be a stranger?

Reply to Broken Husband
Posted by: bryn | 2010/02/05

he has slept with someone and feels guilty.

Reply to bryn
Posted by: XXX | 2010/02/05

Clearly he has a strong fantasy here but he cannot expect you to be happy with this.Has he perhaps sexual urges for a man OR maybe the next step will be that he wants a #sum with a woman ie his turn !
I would not go down that road but rather try different things yourselves.He obviously is a bit bored with your current situation.
Besides the health risks,don' t accept this fantasy of his,it will lead to no good.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: broken woman | 2010/02/05

No, he does not want to watch, he only want to know and feel that i have been with someone else

Reply to broken woman
Posted by: Woman | 2010/02/05

If you are uncomfortable with such an encounter, it is your right to say no! He must respect your wishes, because you are the one in charge of your body and your life, and he doesn' t get to make the rules.

Reply to Woman
Posted by: real man | 2010/02/05

W.T.F so let me get this straight ,your husband is wanting you to have sex with other men while he watches you. well any man that wants his wife to sleep with other men so he can get his kicks from it needs to be admitted to a asylum ,and there can never be any love for you because he obviously don' t respect you. this is only my opinion but lady you need to get a new life and fast,next he will be charging the guys to sleep with you ,and then thats a completely diff, ball game. good luck good lady.

Reply to real man
Posted by: Lynn | 2010/02/05

Bottom line is that if you don' t want to - DON' T! ...and communicate that issue with him.

As in all sexual encounters, both parties must be comfortable and in agreement with initiated experiences.

Reply to Lynn
Posted by: Anon | 2010/02/05

Its a difficult one. Does he want to watch?

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Sexologist | 2010/02/05

Dear Broken woman,

The fantacy your husband is having is not an uncommon fantacy. What is important is that it is a fantasy. Fantasy and reality are two importantly different aspects of life.

The problem here is your husband seemingly wanting to pressure you into a sexual encounter you do not wish to engage in. It would be important that your husband respect your wishes too.

What you need to do is to have an open honest talk with your husband where you express clearly to him about how you feel about his pressuring you to do something you do not wish to do and how it makes you feel.

It may be helpful to consider seeing a sex therapist to assist you with the communication that needs to happen if you feel you cannot manage it on your own.

Reply to Sexologist

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement