Our expert says:
I understand your concern. Your brother and sister CHOSE to have kids, and are legally and morally bound to support them and pay for their maintenance --- not you. But in the situation you describe, apart from putting presure on the brother and sister to perhaps contribute to hiring a maid to help care for the kids, isn't the real situation one in which you do or don't help your mother. If she is working, she has a similar problem to yours. If she is not working, she ought to have enough time to do most of the caring for the kids. Maybe your main objection is to the sense of being taken for granted and feeling FORCED to help care for them, rather than to actually helping the kids and your mother occasionally. Talk it through calmly with her, NOT at a time when you've been arguing about this, and make a plan that includes some compromise on both sides.
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