Posted by: Gudstuff | 2008-10-30

Family issues...

My son just turned 10. I have a niece –  11 yrs, and nephew -17 years, both do not have parents. I have been taking care of them for the past six years. I would have loved to stay with my son, but I feel that they will feel excluded and is cost effective for me to support them with my Mom. I cant do anything for my son without including my niece, kinda twins for me. Visit me during school holidays, organizes their birthday parties every year, their school needs, etc!

I have an elder sister who goes home at least once in a year. She doesn’ t make any contribution at home (at least buy niece/nephew clothes or school things)! Me and my sister do not see eye to eye, in many issues and I have learned to live with that fact and my Mom and brother knows.

It was my son’ s birthday celebration this past weekend. I didn’ t buy my niece new clothes as I didn’ t buy my son’ s during her birthday, which was in August. My brother receives a call from my sister asking why I didn’ t buy my niece new clothes. Apparently my Mom reported that…  I was so surprised cos during her birthday my son didn’ t have new clothes! I was so hurt and angry at my Mom…  I have never done anything for my son without including her (niece) and if my Mother doesn’ t realize that, then I don’ t know. How can she call my sister to report that when she was there and knew what happened during her birthday!!! My brother was just surprised… 

She (Mother) then apologized.

Now I have taken a decision to take my son next year. My brother says that it seems I have not forgiven my mom but I think it is time for all of us (siblings) take care of other kids that do not have parents. It is like they are all my kids cos I have been doing everything for them. It was not an easy decision but I have to do it.

I will continue supporting them at home but I feel that I have been depriving my son of motherly love when no one appreciate that! I know it is gona look like I am abandoning them eventho it isn’ t like that.

Just wanted to share… .

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Our expert says:
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Your mother should indeed have apologised for simply making mischief, and enabling your sister who apparently contributes nothing, to interfere in matters that are none of her business. I agree too that it is fair that ALL the sibs should share the care and support of the orphaned kids, rather than leaving it all to you. Your decision makes good sense, and it's about time they took up their own responsibilities

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