Our expert says:
Some parents are reasonably comfortable with their child moving in with an unmarried partner, many are not, and for both good and bad reasons.
It would be odd though, if the pair of you shared this decision, for them to consider it totally the responsibility and "fault" of your bf.
Clearly, from your description of the situation, if you two moved in together, you would upset and estrange both sets of parents. Would what you would gain by doing so ( apparently nobody is bothered if the two of you get together otherwise ) really be worth it ?
It sounds as if at least part of the issue is your wish to move out and not live with your parents. How would they feel if you moved out to share accomodation with a fellow female student ?
If as you say you ealier got into other kids of trouble, and got involved in drugs, then its surely understandable that they'd be concerned about your welfare and you wouldn't exactly have a long track-record of wisdom and sense. Are they reall being nothing but selfish for opposing the suggestion ?
Its understandable that you'd like the support of your family, which you could probably achieve in a number of other ways and about other issues, but this hardly sounds like its a way to achieve that. To hope to do something that, reasonably or unreasonably, so upsets them, AND to want to have their support, is hardly realistic, is it ?
And Romany raises a simple and crucial issue. If you are totally funding your education and living expenses, and can afford to do this entirely on your own, you are free to do as you wish and cary the consequences. But you can hardly expect them to continue paying for your education if you move out in a way that they so strongly disagree with.
As the old saying does, you can't have your cake and eat it, too
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