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Question
Posted by: Pink | 2010-04-19

Family

please help. I am single and live with my two kids. My family assume because I only date sometimes and have an unoccupied bedroom they can all come and stay with me if they are going through a difficult time and need space or having problems within their marriages.

I am currently living with my mom who are going through a divorce, one of my sisters have asked to move in with me( she planning on getting a divorce) as soon as my mom move out since she does not get along with my mom.

This are becoming a pattern everyone sees me as an option not considering that they are inconveniencing me and my children. They just see it as me being there for them at all times.

I can’ t even bring a date home if my kids are not at home because there are always someone going through a difficult time and having to stay with me. How am I going to get rid of all this people?

I don’ t want to eliminate my family but I know if I refuse that they will hold it against me for the rest of my life and they will not talk to me again, but I cannot go on like this.

I believe that everyone should be able to cope on their own giving emotional support to them are really more than enough.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Remind your family that as a single parent, you are ALWAYS going through a difficult time, and that you can't afford to provide a lodging service for troubled relaives. Tell them you are re-aranging your home, and that the room will no longer be available for their visits, as it will be needed for the children / as a home office for you, whatever else.
If you end this exploitation of you, it won't make them bitter for life. They'll make a fuss i they think they can push you into changing your mind, and then they'll move on to other worries.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-04-19

Remind your family that as a single parent, you are ALWAYS going through a difficult time, and that you can't afford to provide a lodging service for troubled relaives. Tell them you are re-aranging your home, and that the room will no longer be available for their visits, as it will be needed for the children / as a home office for you, whatever else.
If you end this exploitation of you, it won't make them bitter for life. They'll make a fuss i they think they can push you into changing your mind, and then they'll move on to other worries.

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