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Question
Posted by: dw | 2011/03/07

external influences

Please help. I was single for about 2 years where I could date who I wanted whenever I wanted. I have now met someone and we have been seeing eachother for 4 months. He is good for me and makes me feel special. I really want things to work with him and I and have started making changes in myself where I know I fell down in previous relationships. However, Im still in the mindset of being single and have about 2 guys that are always trying their luck with me. The one is engaged and has 5 month old twins. We get on really well and are like soulmates and he wants us to be together when he ends it with his fiancee. However I want to make my current relationship with my current bf last and dont want outside interferences to confuse me. I just dont understand that when I was single, these guys were not interested, but now that I have someone, they are all over me like a rash.
How can I make it known to them that I am happy and dont want their advances, although keeping the friendship?
Thanks in advance.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Why on earth would you even imagine having a relationship with a cheater who is engaged and has already fathered very young twin babies ? The concept of "soulmate" is dangerous nonsense and probably causes as much human misery as most inventions of psychobabble. What sort of "soul-mate is happy to cheat on the woman ( who he probably encouraged to feel similarly privileged ) who bore his children ?
If you want men to understand what you are not looking for , try just telling them

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Heels | 2011/03/07

Simple, you can just tell them. Do not make it sound like it''s hard to do. If you feel it''s hard to do, then it means you are not yet sure about what you want.
P.S. And don''t be friends with someone who is interested in you romantically. That''s just playing with fire - it''s a coward''s way of taking advantage of the attention.

Reply to Heels
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/03/07

Why on earth would you even imagine having a relationship with a cheater who is engaged and has already fathered very young twin babies ? The concept of "soulmate" is dangerous nonsense and probably causes as much human misery as most inventions of psychobabble. What sort of "soul-mate is happy to cheat on the woman ( who he probably encouraged to feel similarly privileged ) who bore his children ?
If you want men to understand what you are not looking for , try just telling them

Reply to cybershrink

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