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Question
Posted by: Jane | 2010-05-06

Emotional connection

Hi Doc
Just need some advice.I started working at a new co last year. This guy started mailling me - saying all the right things, being really complmentary etc and over time I grew really fond of him THinking he was great. Then I found out he was married with a child and he didnt bother to tell me his wife was expecting their second kid! Needless to say I started seeing how manipulative he was. Being so nice to me when he thought we could be alone as he wanted us to spend ''quality time'' together. Luckily I never slept with him! Despite all this I am still so drawn to this lying, deceiptive man. I know that he lacks all integrity but still cannot seem to break all contact. Any ideas on how I can ''get over'' him?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Somyou know he was a liar and a cheat, and stringing you along for his own purposes. How fortunate that you did not sleep with the creep. You CAN and should break all contact with the creep - do you really find creepiness and lying so attractive ? Or do you have such low self-esteem that you feel you deserve to be hurt by someone like this ? See a counsellor and sort this out before you come to more harm.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: just me | 2010-05-07

only u can decide what needs to b done to break all ties with him otherwise u will stoop just as low as u''r makin him out to be,by still being withim...maybe u cant choose who u fell in love with but u can definately choos what u''r gonna do with that feelings whether u''r gona act on it or not, and believe u me, dont act on it, start a new circle of friends,read,go out,give urself the tym of ur life,accept givin in to ur emotions,trustme i''ve bn there, cos if u dont,,,and act on ur feelings, u''ll soon end up in his wife''s shoes, and u beta pray that u dont end up being in love with a husband who''s with another woman

Reply to just me
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-05-07

Somyou know he was a liar and a cheat, and stringing you along for his own purposes. How fortunate that you did not sleep with the creep. You CAN and should break all contact with the creep - do you really find creepiness and lying so attractive ? Or do you have such low self-esteem that you feel you deserve to be hurt by someone like this ? See a counsellor and sort this out before you come to more harm.

Reply to cybershrink

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