Our expert says:
You are, apparently, certain that she is physically and mentally fit ( has she inded had a proper check-up to make sure of this ? ) It sounds very like either a depression or a dementia, or both. If so, then this is a behaviour problem.
To let go and be sloppy when alone at home is any adult's privilege, but it is usually to spruce oneself up a bit when visitors are expected. Rather than nagging her, have you tried calmly asking her why she does this when it clearly distresses others ? ( And part of the problem may be that while she doesn't feel bothered, and maybe most visitors are not bothered, maybe its your own sense of pride that is most wounded ? ) Does she feel it's not worth bothering ? Does she not enjoy dressing pleasantly in the good clothes she has ? Do you take her out - to visit friends, shops, whatever ) - and does she dress up then ?
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