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Question
Posted by: Boing | 2012/02/27

embarassed... I''m scared of phone calls

Okay so this is quite embarrassing..
I really have a problem with making phone calls, even to people I''ve known for years like my grandma!
I don''t know why but I just feel like I will be bothering them or I would freeze up and not know what to say.
I even was without a TV because I did not want to call the cable guy and my mother was in hospital. So I waited for her to make the call.. I know...I''m pathetic... (I''m 25 yrs old)
Please tell me someone else have the same prob because I''m feeling like a freak..
Okay and some extra info, I''m bipolar and also new or large groups of people make my heart beat so fast! They scare me!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

No need at all to feel embarrassed. You're not in the least bit pathetic.
Many of us feel to varying degrees uncomfortable when needing to talk to others on the phone ( indeed, I wonder if this is one of the reasons for the great popularity of e-mail, SMS, and other more indirect methods of communicting ).
There are several reasons why phoning may seem odd, in that you are talking into someone else's ear while a long way away from them, but can't see their face or expressions and responses.
This sort of problem responds well and quickly to Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ( CBT ), and if you see a psychologist who provides this method, it should be soon cleared up. The same person and method could help you learn to feel comfortable and confident in groups of people and talking in public.
qwerty also makes an excellent point about cheat sheets, or jotting down your main points before making or even taking an expected call.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: Liza | 2012/02/28

Great advice from Qwerty. You''re definitely not alone. I''ve got the same problem. On a more positive note - at least we won''t have exorbitant phone bills - lol!

Good Luck
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: qwerty | 2012/02/28

I had the same problem when I was younger... I would get extremely anxious whenever I had to make a call - I''d start stuttering and not know what to say, or forget what I wanted to say - not cool!

What helped me was to always make a " cheat sheet"  before I would make a phone call - a list of things I wanted to say / ask, plus I would write down any information I might have to repeat back (like telephone or ID numbers) so I could just read them off. I did this for a long time, and at some point I found that I didn''t need the cheat sheet anymore, and I was fine making phone calls.

Once you''ve been making calls for a while with no problem, you''ll find you start feeling more confident about making calls, which in return will mean you are more likely to not have problems when making calls. :) Just keep at it and don''t sweat it when it goes badly.

Good luck!!

Reply to qwerty
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/02/28

No need at all to feel embarrassed. You're not in the least bit pathetic.
Many of us feel to varying degrees uncomfortable when needing to talk to others on the phone ( indeed, I wonder if this is one of the reasons for the great popularity of e-mail, SMS, and other more indirect methods of communicting ).
There are several reasons why phoning may seem odd, in that you are talking into someone else's ear while a long way away from them, but can't see their face or expressions and responses.
This sort of problem responds well and quickly to Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ( CBT ), and if you see a psychologist who provides this method, it should be soon cleared up. The same person and method could help you learn to feel comfortable and confident in groups of people and talking in public.
qwerty also makes an excellent point about cheat sheets, or jotting down your main points before making or even taking an expected call.

Reply to cybershrink

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