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Question
Posted by: George - cape town | 2009/10/24

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an 55 and on Viagra - mainly due to loss of confidence when I went through a bout of ED. Things came right after about six months, and almost back to normal.

About three months ago I started loosing it again. Very strong and stiff during foreplay, but as soon as penetration takes place, I start thinking about it, and it goes soft. With Viagra teh problem is solved 90 % of the time.

The problem seems to be when there has been substantial foreplay, an dI am very wet going in. Feeling then seems to be reduced, and it feels a bit like I have ejaculated without the feeling of an orgasm. If I then wait about 30 minutes I can sometimes get it back up and finish the job - much to wifes fustration.

Can anyone tell me what is actually happening ?
Is this a form of "  premature ejaculation"  ?
Is there any action / medication / herb etc that I can take to make it last longer in these situations ? (I have found that Horny Goat Weed has a positive effect)
What can I do to stop getting so wet ? I do worry if there is less foreplay both myself and my wife will not be satisfied)

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Dear George,

The descrotpion of the problem you are experiencing alludes to some finer subtleties and possibilities that this type of forum would not be adequately able to address.

I would suggest that you have the opportunity to sit down with an experienced sex therapist who would be able to help you explore in more depth what you are experiencing and tease out the factors and possible solutions.

For example you say that after penetration takes place you "start thinking about it". This could be a form of psychological distraction that may be raising anxities of performance anxiety which could then impact on you staying present in the moment and with the pleasure sensations of the sexual encounter, which could result in loss of erection.

You talk about periods of substantial foreplay. This would need to be unpacked. What type of foreplay and stimulation and for how long as this may clue us into how this istranslating into what is happening when you then later have penetrative sex. You talk about being very wet. I would assume this may be the production of precum, or may it be that you have actually ejaculated etc.

I hope the examples I mentioned helped illustrate my point why it would be best to rather see a professional in person.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: george | 2009/10/25

agree - tried that and it works like a bomb. perhaps too well

Reply to george
Posted by: Solution | 2009/10/25

No pun intended ! Perhaps try it out on someone else. Remember 90 percent of being randy and erotic is in the mind. With respect maybe your missus just does not do it for you any more. Imagine this to give you the roaring slack, some guy says that the only time his missus moves during sex is when she turns the pages of the book she is reading ! Seriously, try it out on another person and see if you have the same reaction. I' m willing to bet you that you will perform like a stud again, even without Viagra. Its all in the mind.

Reply to Solution
Posted by: Solution | 2009/10/25

No pun intended ! Perhaps try it out on someone else. Remember 90 percent of being randy and erotic is in the mind. With respect maybe your missus just does not do it for you any more. Imagine this to give you the roaring slack, some guy says that the only time his missus moves during sex is when she turns the pages of the book she is reading ! Seriously, try it out on another person and see if you have the same reaction. I' m willing to bet you that you will perform like a stud again, even without Viagra. Its all in the mind.

Reply to Solution
Posted by: Sexologist | 2009/10/25

Dear George,

The descrotpion of the problem you are experiencing alludes to some finer subtleties and possibilities that this type of forum would not be adequately able to address.

I would suggest that you have the opportunity to sit down with an experienced sex therapist who would be able to help you explore in more depth what you are experiencing and tease out the factors and possible solutions.

For example you say that after penetration takes place you "start thinking about it". This could be a form of psychological distraction that may be raising anxities of performance anxiety which could then impact on you staying present in the moment and with the pleasure sensations of the sexual encounter, which could result in loss of erection.

You talk about periods of substantial foreplay. This would need to be unpacked. What type of foreplay and stimulation and for how long as this may clue us into how this istranslating into what is happening when you then later have penetrative sex. You talk about being very wet. I would assume this may be the production of precum, or may it be that you have actually ejaculated etc.

I hope the examples I mentioned helped illustrate my point why it would be best to rather see a professional in person.

Reply to Sexologist

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